After returning to their encampment RoboRabbit did a check to make sure everyone was accounted for. He discovered that Diomedes and Hilarious Hyena were missing from the area, which greatly distressed him. RoboRabbit began organizing search parties and he had arranged two of them when Diomedes appeared with a frightened look on his face.
"It's Hilarious Hyena," he panted after approaching RoboRabbit. "She's the one who caused all of this."
"You must needs some rest," replied RoboRabbit. "Go to your tent and sleep while I finish arranging search parties."
"Who is left to search for?" wondered Diomedes out loud.
"Hilarious Hyena."
"Are you deaf?" yelled Diomedes. "She is the enemy! She's not lost or in enemy hands, she is the enemy hands!"
"Ozzy, please escort this delusional pangolin back to his quarters."
"But, RoboRabbit," answered Ozzy, "I believe he's telling the truth."
"Forsooth!" exclaimed RoboRabbit. "I will do it myself!"
When RoboRabbit returned from forcefully bringing Diomedes to his abode, he found that none remained but the wafflebear.
"Where has everyone gone?" inquired RoboRabbit.
"They have all gone to prepare for war against Hilarious Hyena," replied the wafflebear.
"Then why have you stayed?"
"Because I believe that Hilarious Hyena is not the real enemy."
"Thank you, wafflebear, I shan't forget this," said RoboRabbit. "By the way, what was your name again?"
Just then a large flying machine flew over and lasered all the buildings, two at a time, until all that was left was RoboRabbit's armed army standing among heaps of rubble. "The army began to open fire on the vehicle, and they discovered that inside of said fire were explosives. RoboRabbit managed to make out the shape of a hyena womanning the vehicle, but it couldn't be his hyena. It must have been a different hyena, for Hilarious Hyena would never do that. Whoever womanned the vehicle was a very good drivess. She dodged all of the incoming shots and even managed to injure some warriors.
RoboRabbit decided to discover what their adversary looked like and why she was there. He leaped into the air and landed upon the vehicle, and just as he most definitely had not suspected, there sat Hilarious Hyena at the controls, defeating his army like an oversized anthill.
"Why?" asked RoboRabbit desperately. "Why would you do this?"
"The Vine Master's evil has frustrated me and I cannot be with you," replied Hilarious Hyena confusingly. This confused RoboRabbit as he had thought of her as an eternal ally. He had even thought about adding her into his treaty with three other characters in this story and was planning to eventually do so. This turn of events was so extremely confusing that RoboRabbit's grip on the vehicle loosened greatly and Hilarious Hyena pushed him off gently. But before he fell off he whispered something to her, and as he accelerated towards the approaching ground, the chapter ended in a more sad way than probably any other chapter in this story.
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Saturday, September 22, 2012
No Escape
Egg nog is a very interesting drink. Some people like it, others hate it, and still others are indifferent. For some reason egg nog is typically thought of as a seasonal drink, meant only for the coldest months of the year. Many drinks, such as orange juice, are seasonal for obvious reasons, such as that season being the time the plant used to make it grows best. However, egg nog's name suggests that it is not generated from a specific plant, but rather from chickens or other birds. Thus, the reason for its seasonality is most likely something amgibuously obscure or something blatantly obvious.
As RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome looked up at the skies, Armaninx arrives with Hilarious Hyena. They all watched as a liquid sphere formed around their current planet, obviously preventing flight. Then they realized that there were volcanoes of a sort which were spurting out this shield, so they all decided to investigate one such volcano, which was conveniently ten yards from the small forest occupied by Killer Kangaroo and the wafflebear. They began to climb said volcano which they continued to climb as they climbed it, climbing up its rocky, barely climbable side, until they finished climbing and climbed to the top of the recently climbed volcano.
As the group arrived at the top, the volcanoes all stopped erupting, as the shield was complete. They looked down and found that Ozzy had already beat them to it. She stood at the bottom of an unfortunate staircase which ran down the tunnel. Next to her was a large switch which was flipped down, obviously by her doing.
"Someone wants us to stay on this planet," she hollered up, "and we'd best find out who it is."
Ozzy came back up the stairs and told them that the switch was labeled "Smith." They returned to their large group to develop a plan,, which took much deliberation.
"Costa Lxodi," said RoboRabbit, "what is the largest spoon we have that can be used on this egg nog?"
"There is no spoon," replied Costa Lxodi. "They all melted when I carried them over."
"RoboRabbit!" exclaimed Claudio McAwesome. "There are agents following us. They're coming to capture you!"
After Diomedes joined them, they departed from the volcano. They soon found themselves cornered and so climbed into the wall to hide from the agent. As they heard noises from outside the wall, Ozzy tried to suppress a cough. Unforunately, too much dust got in her lungs and she was unable to stop herself from couging, thus revealing her location.
"Go without me!" said Diomedes. "I will disract them!"
He then proceeded to break through the wall with his head, falling on Agent Smith. Ozzy wanted to stay and help, but RoboRabbit dragged her along and they escaped through the sewers. When they returned to their settlement, they gathered what they had and prepared for assault.
As RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome looked up at the skies, Armaninx arrives with Hilarious Hyena. They all watched as a liquid sphere formed around their current planet, obviously preventing flight. Then they realized that there were volcanoes of a sort which were spurting out this shield, so they all decided to investigate one such volcano, which was conveniently ten yards from the small forest occupied by Killer Kangaroo and the wafflebear. They began to climb said volcano which they continued to climb as they climbed it, climbing up its rocky, barely climbable side, until they finished climbing and climbed to the top of the recently climbed volcano.
As the group arrived at the top, the volcanoes all stopped erupting, as the shield was complete. They looked down and found that Ozzy had already beat them to it. She stood at the bottom of an unfortunate staircase which ran down the tunnel. Next to her was a large switch which was flipped down, obviously by her doing.
"Someone wants us to stay on this planet," she hollered up, "and we'd best find out who it is."
Ozzy came back up the stairs and told them that the switch was labeled "Smith." They returned to their large group to develop a plan,, which took much deliberation.
"Costa Lxodi," said RoboRabbit, "what is the largest spoon we have that can be used on this egg nog?"
"There is no spoon," replied Costa Lxodi. "They all melted when I carried them over."
"RoboRabbit!" exclaimed Claudio McAwesome. "There are agents following us. They're coming to capture you!"
After Diomedes joined them, they departed from the volcano. They soon found themselves cornered and so climbed into the wall to hide from the agent. As they heard noises from outside the wall, Ozzy tried to suppress a cough. Unforunately, too much dust got in her lungs and she was unable to stop herself from couging, thus revealing her location.
"Go without me!" said Diomedes. "I will disract them!"
He then proceeded to break through the wall with his head, falling on Agent Smith. Ozzy wanted to stay and help, but RoboRabbit dragged her along and they escaped through the sewers. When they returned to their settlement, they gathered what they had and prepared for assault.
Inhabitants
After the events on Iohsw, the whole group decided to go to Armaninx's home planet, Standos, and live there for a time. Oapsuf needed something that he hoped to find there, and the planet had no evil on it. So they gathered the parts needed to make a simple spacecraft and traveled to Standos to start a civilization thee. Costa Lxodi led most of the group in creating houses while Armaninx, Claudio McAwesome, Hilarious Hyena, and RoboRabbit set out to explore the area. RoboRabbit created for himself a Shifqwqeos, an article of cothing that covered him entirely and billowed around him, out of nearby vegetation. He modified the Shifqwqeos to generate background music, since Standos had no musicians in the sky. Then, as the four explored the planet, there emanated from RoboRabbit a mysterious tune with an exciting aura of adventure to it.
RoboRabbit soo came to a somewhat forested area and entered into it. It was only a few steps in that he found a clearing which was solely occupied by a small house. It was camoflauged to look like the trees and ground around it and had no windows and one door which looked like a rock. Curious, RoboRabbit listened through the door and heard loud thumping noises, like a giant ball bouncing up and down. Then he heard a delicious growl and decided to knock on the door. It was opened almost immediately by a thin wafflebear, who smelled delightful.
"I'm a wafflebear," said the wafflebear.
"I'm a cyborg rabbit," said RoboRabbit.
"Awesomesauce," replied the short wafflebear.
"My name is RoboRabbit," said RoboRabbit. "What's yours?"
"Me?" said the wafflebear rhetorically, "My name is-"
"Hey dude, what goes on?" interrupted a kangaroo thrice the size of the wafflebear, who must have been the one making the thumping sounds.
"I was just meeting RoboRabbit here," answered the wafflebear.
"Ohai RoboRabbit," said the kangaroo, "I'm Killer Kangaroo, one of the two current inhabitants of planet Standos."
Then the wafflebear said, "And my name is-"
"Hey, RoboRabbit!" exclaimed Claudio McAwesome as she walked out of the forest. "Watcha' doin'?"
"Straw, Claudio McAwesome," replied RoboRabbit, "I was just meeting these nice people, apparently the sole inhabitants of this planet."
"Greeting," said Claudio McAwesome. "My name is claudio McAwesome, as aforementioned by RoboRabbit. What are you called?"
"Well," started the wafflebear before being interrupted by Killer Kangaroo.
"I'm known as Killer Kangaroo, and this is-"
But as you may have guessed, he was stopped by a conveniently well-timed earthquake. And thus, the chapter ended.
RoboRabbit soo came to a somewhat forested area and entered into it. It was only a few steps in that he found a clearing which was solely occupied by a small house. It was camoflauged to look like the trees and ground around it and had no windows and one door which looked like a rock. Curious, RoboRabbit listened through the door and heard loud thumping noises, like a giant ball bouncing up and down. Then he heard a delicious growl and decided to knock on the door. It was opened almost immediately by a thin wafflebear, who smelled delightful.
"I'm a wafflebear," said the wafflebear.
"I'm a cyborg rabbit," said RoboRabbit.
"Awesomesauce," replied the short wafflebear.
"My name is RoboRabbit," said RoboRabbit. "What's yours?"
"Me?" said the wafflebear rhetorically, "My name is-"
"Hey dude, what goes on?" interrupted a kangaroo thrice the size of the wafflebear, who must have been the one making the thumping sounds.
"I was just meeting RoboRabbit here," answered the wafflebear.
"Ohai RoboRabbit," said the kangaroo, "I'm Killer Kangaroo, one of the two current inhabitants of planet Standos."
Then the wafflebear said, "And my name is-"
"Hey, RoboRabbit!" exclaimed Claudio McAwesome as she walked out of the forest. "Watcha' doin'?"
"Straw, Claudio McAwesome," replied RoboRabbit, "I was just meeting these nice people, apparently the sole inhabitants of this planet."
"Greeting," said Claudio McAwesome. "My name is claudio McAwesome, as aforementioned by RoboRabbit. What are you called?"
"Well," started the wafflebear before being interrupted by Killer Kangaroo.
"I'm known as Killer Kangaroo, and this is-"
But as you may have guessed, he was stopped by a conveniently well-timed earthquake. And thus, the chapter ended.
Hole
While RoboRabbit and the others were safe, there still remained the fact that Jhoqi and Upooq were under the control of the Vine Master, not to mention that Armaninx and Darkprint and Big Fat Husky and Green Wart Hog and Big Tall Moose and Costa Lxodi were in the midst of it all. The group decided to try to rescue as many of them as possible. The expedition would be a hard one, and it required the making of a hole in the wall of vines. For this, RoboRabbit and Platypus engineered a giant laser which would shoot in the outline of a circle, so that if you were in the middle of the laser you could walk through it.
The laser was built next to the wall and they built a door so that you could walk into it and walk along the laser, as mentioned before. When they turned it on, it worked perfectly and created a hole in the vine wall in less than five. Then RoboRabbit entered the laser and walked through the hole, followed by Claudio McAwesome, Platypus, Teddy, Oapsuf, and Hilarious Hyena. They sneaked along a river and encountered an underground tunnel to Jhoqi's treeehouse that had been dug long ago. They found that someone had blocked the entrance with several dead bodies.
"How are we to get in?" asked Hilarious Hyena aloud.
"Perhaps I can be of assistance," said Diomedes, who, along with Ozzy the Dalmation, had been following them for some time.
"How so?" questioned Oapsuf.
"Well," answered Diomedes, "a dead body is the opposite of a live body, correct?"
"Correct," said RoboRabbit.
"So, then," continued Diomedes, "A dead body can be thought of as a negative body."
"I see where this is going," sighed Claudio McAwesome.
"Thereforem all that is required is to take the square root of the negative bodies, and you end up with imaginary bodies, which are a lot less smelly and won't clog up your hole here," finished Diomedes.
"That makes sense!" exclaimed Ozzy.
"Most indeededly," agreed Platypus.
And so they square rooted the dead obstacles and continued on their journey to Jhoqii's abode. The tunnel eventally spit them out in the lowest underground room of Jhoqi's place. They wiped the saliva from themselves and went up a staircase to find Jhoqi herself in the next room. She was the only one who had made it thus far because she was the one who knew the path to get there. Jhoqi informed them that everyone but Upooq was already out of the house. Claudio McAwesome wanted to go back for Upooq, but RoboRabbit knew he wasn't ready yet. They exited the premises via the tunnel, rounded up Armaninx, Darkprint, Big Fat Husky, Green Wart Hog, Big Tall Moose, and Costa Lxodi, and came back through the hole in the wall of vines. After they returned to their side of the wall, RoboRabbit turned off the laser so they wouldn't be followed, and the vines quickly grew to fill the hole. Everyone celebrated that they had escaped, but their departure from the evil on the other side was nothing compared to the difficulties to come.
The laser was built next to the wall and they built a door so that you could walk into it and walk along the laser, as mentioned before. When they turned it on, it worked perfectly and created a hole in the vine wall in less than five. Then RoboRabbit entered the laser and walked through the hole, followed by Claudio McAwesome, Platypus, Teddy, Oapsuf, and Hilarious Hyena. They sneaked along a river and encountered an underground tunnel to Jhoqi's treeehouse that had been dug long ago. They found that someone had blocked the entrance with several dead bodies.
"How are we to get in?" asked Hilarious Hyena aloud.
"Perhaps I can be of assistance," said Diomedes, who, along with Ozzy the Dalmation, had been following them for some time.
"How so?" questioned Oapsuf.
"Well," answered Diomedes, "a dead body is the opposite of a live body, correct?"
"Correct," said RoboRabbit.
"So, then," continued Diomedes, "A dead body can be thought of as a negative body."
"I see where this is going," sighed Claudio McAwesome.
"Thereforem all that is required is to take the square root of the negative bodies, and you end up with imaginary bodies, which are a lot less smelly and won't clog up your hole here," finished Diomedes.
"That makes sense!" exclaimed Ozzy.
"Most indeededly," agreed Platypus.
And so they square rooted the dead obstacles and continued on their journey to Jhoqii's abode. The tunnel eventally spit them out in the lowest underground room of Jhoqi's place. They wiped the saliva from themselves and went up a staircase to find Jhoqi herself in the next room. She was the only one who had made it thus far because she was the one who knew the path to get there. Jhoqi informed them that everyone but Upooq was already out of the house. Claudio McAwesome wanted to go back for Upooq, but RoboRabbit knew he wasn't ready yet. They exited the premises via the tunnel, rounded up Armaninx, Darkprint, Big Fat Husky, Green Wart Hog, Big Tall Moose, and Costa Lxodi, and came back through the hole in the wall of vines. After they returned to their side of the wall, RoboRabbit turned off the laser so they wouldn't be followed, and the vines quickly grew to fill the hole. Everyone celebrated that they had escaped, but their departure from the evil on the other side was nothing compared to the difficulties to come.
Separation
Over a month after Valentine's Day was Oapsuf's birthday, and two months after that was RoboRabbit's birthday. He shared a celebration with Claudio McAwesome, whose birthday was two days after his. No other significant events happened from Valentine's Day to RoboRabbit's and Claudio McAwesome's joined party, so I will spare you the boredom of everything that happened and skip right to the exciting part.
Ambassadors from the planets Epmoxs and Miuxwodih even showed up for the birthdays. They were, respectively, a female Dalmation, who was followed by a spot-light wherever she walked, and a male Pangolin, which is an actual animal that is similar to a mix between an armadillo and an anteater. The Dalmation was called Ozzy, and Diomedes was the name of the Pangolin. The people of Epmoxs and Miuxwodih were strong allies and had jointly decided to attend the celebration, which was to involve a tournament in the art of Patih Pdopw Khep. As it so happened, Ozzy, Diomedes, and Armaninx were the only three to show up at the celebration, so the five of them went to go see a fairly new movie. Then, since it was National Free Balloon Day, they went out and got a balloon. And they ran with the balloon and they went to the beach with the balloon. Then they took a bike ride with the balloon, and they went to the movies and arcade and the ice rink and the pizza shop and the moon and the sky and under a car and behind a dumpster and the candy shop and Ozzy's back yard and in a plane and over a rock and under a hill and with a whale. They loved borrowing! Then the balloon popped and they spent the rest of the day playing Patih Pdopw Khep, a two-dimensional game with three-dimensional graphics which involved flinging people off the screen with as much force as possible.
Afterwards half of them played Battleart III, a real-time strategy game. And so RoboRabbit's and Claudio McAwesome's shared birthday celebration turned out to be awesomulartasticool, though it surely would have been much better had Hilarious Hyena been there. As it turns out, she later informed RoboRabbit that she had to leave and stay on planet Posahf for the next four ot five. When asked why, she said there was a great evil that she was avoiding by leaving, and they would be able to stay in contact while she was gone. Then RoboRabbit said his goodbyes and she left for Posahf
RoboRabbit tried to keep his mind off of recent matters during the time of Paddih, a three month celebration which involved no working or fighting, only playing and practicing. During Paddih, RoboRabbit went to remote regions of the galaxy and created an empire consisting of several planets. Then he returned home and kept his empire under control from there, while conversing constantly with Hilarious Hyena over the long distane that separated them. I realize this is not a love story, so after the next sentence I will refrain from mentioning anything about love. As paddih progressed, the love between them grew exponentially until it was at least 1023 times its original size when the celebration ended, at which point Hilarious Hyena returned to Iohsw and their lives returned to normal, if one could use normal to describe either of them at any point.
Ambassadors from the planets Epmoxs and Miuxwodih even showed up for the birthdays. They were, respectively, a female Dalmation, who was followed by a spot-light wherever she walked, and a male Pangolin, which is an actual animal that is similar to a mix between an armadillo and an anteater. The Dalmation was called Ozzy, and Diomedes was the name of the Pangolin. The people of Epmoxs and Miuxwodih were strong allies and had jointly decided to attend the celebration, which was to involve a tournament in the art of Patih Pdopw Khep. As it so happened, Ozzy, Diomedes, and Armaninx were the only three to show up at the celebration, so the five of them went to go see a fairly new movie. Then, since it was National Free Balloon Day, they went out and got a balloon. And they ran with the balloon and they went to the beach with the balloon. Then they took a bike ride with the balloon, and they went to the movies and arcade and the ice rink and the pizza shop and the moon and the sky and under a car and behind a dumpster and the candy shop and Ozzy's back yard and in a plane and over a rock and under a hill and with a whale. They loved borrowing! Then the balloon popped and they spent the rest of the day playing Patih Pdopw Khep, a two-dimensional game with three-dimensional graphics which involved flinging people off the screen with as much force as possible.
Afterwards half of them played Battleart III, a real-time strategy game. And so RoboRabbit's and Claudio McAwesome's shared birthday celebration turned out to be awesomulartasticool, though it surely would have been much better had Hilarious Hyena been there. As it turns out, she later informed RoboRabbit that she had to leave and stay on planet Posahf for the next four ot five. When asked why, she said there was a great evil that she was avoiding by leaving, and they would be able to stay in contact while she was gone. Then RoboRabbit said his goodbyes and she left for Posahf
RoboRabbit tried to keep his mind off of recent matters during the time of Paddih, a three month celebration which involved no working or fighting, only playing and practicing. During Paddih, RoboRabbit went to remote regions of the galaxy and created an empire consisting of several planets. Then he returned home and kept his empire under control from there, while conversing constantly with Hilarious Hyena over the long distane that separated them. I realize this is not a love story, so after the next sentence I will refrain from mentioning anything about love. As paddih progressed, the love between them grew exponentially until it was at least 1023 times its original size when the celebration ended, at which point Hilarious Hyena returned to Iohsw and their lives returned to normal, if one could use normal to describe either of them at any point.
Valentine's Bunny
We have now come to another part in the story where I must dedicate a chapter to a certain day of the year. And before you ask, I will tell you that planet Iohsw has New Years on a different day, so it was not skipped. However, for those who haven't noticed, I forgot Jhoqi's birthday, so I will just put it in a year's worth of the story.
"Well," said RoboRabbit, "the author wants us to make this chapter about love, so let's get down to business: could someone please tell me what love is?"
"You don't know what love is?" Claudio McAwesome incredulously asked after a wave of gasps from everyone present. "Well, it looks like we're going to have to work together to form a working definition of love for RoboRabbit."
So they coordinated a presentation of the definition of love, which took several days.* When they finally finished, they performed it, as you might expect.
Teddy stepped forward and said, "Love is a noun, but it must also be a verb."
Then Claudio McAwesome and the others, respectively, sang in turn:
Love is when you realize,
Despite their looks or their size,
That you've got a really awesome friend,
And you like every single thing about them.
None can tell if you have love,
If there's one you're always thinking of.
Only you can know it's there,
And you'll go through life as a pair.
This is the love song.
I gotta say,
There's no other way,
To tell you this,
But through the love song.
All of the time,
You're on my mind.
I have no choice,
Except to sing the love song.
Even when life is hard,
You hold them in the highest regard.
You'd rather be with no one,
But your love, you shining sun.
You love them and they love you,
And when they smile, you grin too.
Go through all, thick and thin,
If I must then I'll sing it again.
This is the love song.
I gotta say,
There's no other way,
To tell you this,
But through the love song.
All of the time,
You're on my mind.
I have no choice,
Except to sing the love song.
You go through life together,
Two birds of a feather.
It's the opposite of hate.
Before you say it you contemplate.
And when you say it to them,
It's worth much more than a gem.
And they know that it means,
To you they're higher than kings and queens.
This is the love song.
I gotta say,
There's no other way,
To tell you this,
But through the love song.
All of the time,
You're on my mind.
I have no choice,
Except to sing the love song.
I gotta say,
There's no other way,
To tell you this,
But through the love song.
As each day,
goes away,
I love you more.
It's you I adore.
After Hilarious Hyena finished the song, it was silent for quite some time. RoboRabbit was speechless after such an amazing perfrmance. Eventually everyone left, one by one, except RoboRabbit and Hilarious Hyena. Even I am unsure if this was planned or not, but Hilarious Hyena approached RoboRabbit. She came very close to him and then she addressed him.
"RoboRabbit," she whispered.
"Yes?" replied RoboRabbit, also whispering.
"I love you."
Then RoboRabbit tooke her hand and said, "I love you too." So, as I conclude this chapter, the story has come to a point where you say "Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww."
*Yes, it's still Valentine's Day
"Well," said RoboRabbit, "the author wants us to make this chapter about love, so let's get down to business: could someone please tell me what love is?"
"You don't know what love is?" Claudio McAwesome incredulously asked after a wave of gasps from everyone present. "Well, it looks like we're going to have to work together to form a working definition of love for RoboRabbit."
So they coordinated a presentation of the definition of love, which took several days.* When they finally finished, they performed it, as you might expect.
Teddy stepped forward and said, "Love is a noun, but it must also be a verb."
Then Claudio McAwesome and the others, respectively, sang in turn:
Love is when you realize,
Despite their looks or their size,
That you've got a really awesome friend,
And you like every single thing about them.
None can tell if you have love,
If there's one you're always thinking of.
Only you can know it's there,
And you'll go through life as a pair.
This is the love song.
I gotta say,
There's no other way,
To tell you this,
But through the love song.
All of the time,
You're on my mind.
I have no choice,
Except to sing the love song.
Even when life is hard,
You hold them in the highest regard.
You'd rather be with no one,
But your love, you shining sun.
You love them and they love you,
And when they smile, you grin too.
Go through all, thick and thin,
If I must then I'll sing it again.
This is the love song.
I gotta say,
There's no other way,
To tell you this,
But through the love song.
All of the time,
You're on my mind.
I have no choice,
Except to sing the love song.
You go through life together,
Two birds of a feather.
It's the opposite of hate.
Before you say it you contemplate.
And when you say it to them,
It's worth much more than a gem.
And they know that it means,
To you they're higher than kings and queens.
This is the love song.
I gotta say,
There's no other way,
To tell you this,
But through the love song.
All of the time,
You're on my mind.
I have no choice,
Except to sing the love song.
I gotta say,
There's no other way,
To tell you this,
But through the love song.
As each day,
goes away,
I love you more.
It's you I adore.
After Hilarious Hyena finished the song, it was silent for quite some time. RoboRabbit was speechless after such an amazing perfrmance. Eventually everyone left, one by one, except RoboRabbit and Hilarious Hyena. Even I am unsure if this was planned or not, but Hilarious Hyena approached RoboRabbit. She came very close to him and then she addressed him.
"RoboRabbit," she whispered.
"Yes?" replied RoboRabbit, also whispering.
"I love you."
Then RoboRabbit tooke her hand and said, "I love you too." So, as I conclude this chapter, the story has come to a point where you say "Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww."
*Yes, it's still Valentine's Day
A Common Enemy
Claudio McAwesome had been feeling worse and worse since the depredation. When they had made it to tracks that were twelve minutes old, she sat down abruptly, unable to keep going.
"Are you okay?" asked Oapsuf.
"No," she responded. "I feel like something is building up inside me, and has been for quite some time. And now it's almost ready to burst."
"Well," said Oapsuf, "I can't carry it for you, but I can carry you!"
Having said this, he lifted Claudio McAwesome and carried her onward as they tracked Teddy and Turtle. They soon caught up on lost distance, and then they proceeded to gain on their enemies. When they caught up, RoboRabbit went straight for Teddy and slammed him into the ground. At the same time, Oapsuf, who had already placed Claudio McAwesome on the ground, rushed at Turtle and drop-kicked him hard enough to leave a crack in his shell. In the midst of all this, Hilarious Hyena burst out laughing, which greatly confused her enemies. As RoboRabbit and Oapsuf continued to wrestle with Teddy and Turtle, respectively, and Hilarious Hyena continued laughing, they were all ablivious to Claudio McAwesome, who stood up as the fray continued.
"Stop!" she shouted audaciously. "I've discovered what is inside me, and it will explode very soon. It is enlightenment. It is knowledge. Somt of it has already come, and I know that there is no point in you fighting. RoboRabbit, you are the main character of this story. You are the one whom everyone looks up to. Fighting without reason ill becomes you.
"And Oapsuf, I am the only one here who knows it, but you are a prince. Why should a prince fight on a whim? Why are you fighting?"
"Well," said Teddy. "RoboRabbit, uh... he kind of, uh..."
"He what?! Attacked you without reason? Well now you destroyed his planet without reason! Now your even. And I have a feeling that something very powerful is going to attack us. We must prepare."
"I guess you're right," replied Teddy. "I'll help you against any common enemies, RoboRabbit, but I am neutral towards you."
"As am I to you," said RoboRabbit.
"Teddy, I know what we're gonna do today!"
"Whatcha doin'?" asked Hilarioud Hyena, who had wandered off when Claduio McAwesome started yelling.
"Oh, hi, Hilarious Hyena," said RoboRabbit. "We were just about to go fight a common enemy."
"Cool, can I come with you?"
"You sure can," said Roboabbit. "Hey, where's Turtle?"
"He was here a few minutes ago," said Teddy.
"Oh well, we'll just go on without him."
So they traveled back to Jhoqi's treehouse, but before they got there Turtle appeared and stopped them.
"You can't go any farther," he said. Then he slammed the ground on either side of him, somehow causing a row of green to sprout. It quickly grew and soon there was an impenetrable wall of vines directly behind Turtle. RoboRabbit shot a hole in the wall, and the vines grew back quicker than the eye could see.
"Why not?" asked Teddy. "Why can't we go on?"
"I am just the messenger," replied Turtle.
"Then why are you stopping us?" asked RoboRabbit.
"Because I was ordered to."
"By whom?" asked Teddy. "Who would tell you to do such a thing?"
"Someone you know," he replied. "But I will say no more. You are not permitted to pass."
"And you think you can stop us?" Oapsuf rheorically questioned. As he said this he charged at Turtle and punched him in the gut, breaking his own wrist.
"Find your friend who is on this side of the vine wall. He will guide you from here."
Up until now, they had been oblivious to the fact that someone else had lef Jhoqi's treehouse and made it past the line where the vine wall now stood. Thus, they were very surprised to hear Turtle's words and find a set of webbed tracks leading into the distance. And by now you may be able to tell that this story will confuse you before it is clarified.
"The Vine Master is targeting you," said Platypus, whom they had tracked and soon found. "I told Turtle to set up that wall for your own protection. Jhoqi and Upooq are under the influence of the Vine Master, although Jhoqi may be able to break free soon enough. As longg as you are on this side of the wall, you are mostly safe. RoboRabbit, the Vine Master is targeting you and Oapsuf, so I suggest you keep your allies on this side of the wall.
"But I warn you both now that there will be times when you have to cross the line of the wall. I will give you one hope, these blueprints." Platypus pulled out two copies of blueprints and handed them to Oapsuf and RoboRabbit.
"You must spend much of this story building these shields. They will protect you mostly from the Vine Master and allow you to leave this galaxy, which will be difficult as long as the Vine Master can stop you. I have given these blueprints to Jhoqi and Upooq, but it will take them much longer to build them. Now, are there any questions?"
"You bet there are," answered RoboRabbit. "How could the Vine Master have survived the depredation that recently occurred."
"The Vine Master," replied Platypus, "anticipated the depredation and followed you into Jhoqi's treehouse."
"And what," asked Oapsuf, "are we to do while we finish our shields?"
"You will be in a constant struggle. You will be always fighting the Vine Master until your shields are completed. And when they are done, you will want to escape as quickly as possible."
"So we have to create shields while simultaneously fighting the Vine Master," observed RoboRabbit. "Nothing more impossible than I've done before."
"Confidence is believing in yourself against any odds. It is more powerful than all of your weapons combined, and you will need it to reach the end of this story"
"Are you okay?" asked Oapsuf.
"No," she responded. "I feel like something is building up inside me, and has been for quite some time. And now it's almost ready to burst."
"Well," said Oapsuf, "I can't carry it for you, but I can carry you!"
Having said this, he lifted Claudio McAwesome and carried her onward as they tracked Teddy and Turtle. They soon caught up on lost distance, and then they proceeded to gain on their enemies. When they caught up, RoboRabbit went straight for Teddy and slammed him into the ground. At the same time, Oapsuf, who had already placed Claudio McAwesome on the ground, rushed at Turtle and drop-kicked him hard enough to leave a crack in his shell. In the midst of all this, Hilarious Hyena burst out laughing, which greatly confused her enemies. As RoboRabbit and Oapsuf continued to wrestle with Teddy and Turtle, respectively, and Hilarious Hyena continued laughing, they were all ablivious to Claudio McAwesome, who stood up as the fray continued.
"Stop!" she shouted audaciously. "I've discovered what is inside me, and it will explode very soon. It is enlightenment. It is knowledge. Somt of it has already come, and I know that there is no point in you fighting. RoboRabbit, you are the main character of this story. You are the one whom everyone looks up to. Fighting without reason ill becomes you.
"And Oapsuf, I am the only one here who knows it, but you are a prince. Why should a prince fight on a whim? Why are you fighting?"
"Well," said Teddy. "RoboRabbit, uh... he kind of, uh..."
"He what?! Attacked you without reason? Well now you destroyed his planet without reason! Now your even. And I have a feeling that something very powerful is going to attack us. We must prepare."
"I guess you're right," replied Teddy. "I'll help you against any common enemies, RoboRabbit, but I am neutral towards you."
"As am I to you," said RoboRabbit.
"Teddy, I know what we're gonna do today!"
"Whatcha doin'?" asked Hilarioud Hyena, who had wandered off when Claduio McAwesome started yelling.
"Oh, hi, Hilarious Hyena," said RoboRabbit. "We were just about to go fight a common enemy."
"Cool, can I come with you?"
"You sure can," said Roboabbit. "Hey, where's Turtle?"
"He was here a few minutes ago," said Teddy.
"Oh well, we'll just go on without him."
So they traveled back to Jhoqi's treehouse, but before they got there Turtle appeared and stopped them.
"You can't go any farther," he said. Then he slammed the ground on either side of him, somehow causing a row of green to sprout. It quickly grew and soon there was an impenetrable wall of vines directly behind Turtle. RoboRabbit shot a hole in the wall, and the vines grew back quicker than the eye could see.
"Why not?" asked Teddy. "Why can't we go on?"
"I am just the messenger," replied Turtle.
"Then why are you stopping us?" asked RoboRabbit.
"Because I was ordered to."
"By whom?" asked Teddy. "Who would tell you to do such a thing?"
"Someone you know," he replied. "But I will say no more. You are not permitted to pass."
"And you think you can stop us?" Oapsuf rheorically questioned. As he said this he charged at Turtle and punched him in the gut, breaking his own wrist.
"Find your friend who is on this side of the vine wall. He will guide you from here."
Up until now, they had been oblivious to the fact that someone else had lef Jhoqi's treehouse and made it past the line where the vine wall now stood. Thus, they were very surprised to hear Turtle's words and find a set of webbed tracks leading into the distance. And by now you may be able to tell that this story will confuse you before it is clarified.
"The Vine Master is targeting you," said Platypus, whom they had tracked and soon found. "I told Turtle to set up that wall for your own protection. Jhoqi and Upooq are under the influence of the Vine Master, although Jhoqi may be able to break free soon enough. As longg as you are on this side of the wall, you are mostly safe. RoboRabbit, the Vine Master is targeting you and Oapsuf, so I suggest you keep your allies on this side of the wall.
"But I warn you both now that there will be times when you have to cross the line of the wall. I will give you one hope, these blueprints." Platypus pulled out two copies of blueprints and handed them to Oapsuf and RoboRabbit.
"You must spend much of this story building these shields. They will protect you mostly from the Vine Master and allow you to leave this galaxy, which will be difficult as long as the Vine Master can stop you. I have given these blueprints to Jhoqi and Upooq, but it will take them much longer to build them. Now, are there any questions?"
"You bet there are," answered RoboRabbit. "How could the Vine Master have survived the depredation that recently occurred."
"The Vine Master," replied Platypus, "anticipated the depredation and followed you into Jhoqi's treehouse."
"And what," asked Oapsuf, "are we to do while we finish our shields?"
"You will be in a constant struggle. You will be always fighting the Vine Master until your shields are completed. And when they are done, you will want to escape as quickly as possible."
"So we have to create shields while simultaneously fighting the Vine Master," observed RoboRabbit. "Nothing more impossible than I've done before."
"Confidence is believing in yourself against any odds. It is more powerful than all of your weapons combined, and you will need it to reach the end of this story"
Decreasing Entropy
When Upooq entered the shield generator room they saw a horrible site. The whole room was cold, and no one was radiating any heat. Soon RoboRabbit crawled out of the center, but he wasn't the RoboRabbit they recognized. He had become completely white from the force of Teddy's powerful depredator. He had pulled Hilarious Hyena out with him, and while she was unconscious, she had still retained her basic appearance and general awesomeness. Jhoqi was the only one who seemed at all unaffected from powering the shield generator. She was sitting cross-legged in her chair, watching everyone else.
"The shield generator must be prepared," she said. "Upooq will help me. While we are doing that, you must find Teddy and Turtle. They cannot escape judgement."
They soon decided to send Claudio McAwesome, Oapsuf, and RoboRabbit to find Teddy and Turtle. RoboRabbit went because he was powerful and conscious and had only one weakness. Claudio McAwesome and Oapsuf went because Jhoqi had told them earlier to "follow the white rabbit," which now made perfect sense. The trio examined the wreckage caused by Teddy and Turtle's depredator and followed the path of the destruction to its source. They found the depredator of doom, which was destroyed from its own force, and a shield generator about 100 meters from the depredator. It had obviously been used to keep Teddy and Turtle alive during the explosion. When they found tracks leading away from the shield generator, Hilarious Hyena walked up and unitentionally matched every footstep of Turtle and Teddy.
"Hey guys," she said, "can I join you?"
"I's be sad if you left," said RoboRabbit, although this wwas obviously not true because RoboRabbit could not experience sadness.
"Is that a yes?" asked Hilarious Hyena.
"Yes," said RoboRabbit.
So they set out to find Teddy and Turtle, and they eventually found themselves at a lake, which the footprints led dtraight into. RoboRabbit pulled out an index card with the letter Q on the back.
"My Q card says not to strain yourself while swimming," he said.
Not paying attention, Hilarious Hyena dove into the lake and strained herself, causing the lake water to all drain out from her straining. Claudio McAwesome was about to reprimand her when Oapsuf pointed at the bottom of the lake, where the footprints they were following led to the other side of the lake.
"How this story makes sense," said Claudio McAawesome, "I will never know."
"The shield generator must be prepared," she said. "Upooq will help me. While we are doing that, you must find Teddy and Turtle. They cannot escape judgement."
They soon decided to send Claudio McAwesome, Oapsuf, and RoboRabbit to find Teddy and Turtle. RoboRabbit went because he was powerful and conscious and had only one weakness. Claudio McAwesome and Oapsuf went because Jhoqi had told them earlier to "follow the white rabbit," which now made perfect sense. The trio examined the wreckage caused by Teddy and Turtle's depredator and followed the path of the destruction to its source. They found the depredator of doom, which was destroyed from its own force, and a shield generator about 100 meters from the depredator. It had obviously been used to keep Teddy and Turtle alive during the explosion. When they found tracks leading away from the shield generator, Hilarious Hyena walked up and unitentionally matched every footstep of Turtle and Teddy.
"Hey guys," she said, "can I join you?"
"I's be sad if you left," said RoboRabbit, although this wwas obviously not true because RoboRabbit could not experience sadness.
"Is that a yes?" asked Hilarious Hyena.
"Yes," said RoboRabbit.
So they set out to find Teddy and Turtle, and they eventually found themselves at a lake, which the footprints led dtraight into. RoboRabbit pulled out an index card with the letter Q on the back.
"My Q card says not to strain yourself while swimming," he said.
Not paying attention, Hilarious Hyena dove into the lake and strained herself, causing the lake water to all drain out from her straining. Claudio McAwesome was about to reprimand her when Oapsuf pointed at the bottom of the lake, where the footprints they were following led to the other side of the lake.
"How this story makes sense," said Claudio McAawesome, "I will never know."
Depredation
"I sense it coming," said Jhoqi. "It is now swiftly approaching."
"What is it?" questioned Upooq.
"It's a hole," replied Jhoqi promptly.
"What kind of hole?" asked Hilarious Hyena.
"It's a hole in our universal peace," said Jhoqi. "We must raise the emergency shields."
"Are you sure," asked Upooq, "those shields can only be raised once for a short amount of time."
"I am sure," she replied. "We must raise them quickly. Hurry!" Upooq quickly went downstairs to turn the powerful shields on.
"You and I must power the shields up with our awesomeness," said Jhoqi to Hilarious Hyena. "It must be as strong as possible to withstand the hole. Follow me."
Hilarious Hyena went with Jhoqi into a room that was directly above the room Upooq had gone to. The room was empty except for five chairs forming a circle in the middle. Hilarious Hyena and Jhoqi sat down in two of them. They soon felt the shields turn on, and they felt the energy in the room as they powered up the shields. The radius covered by the shields was not large, so Upooq would have to quickly find people and bring them into it to save them. In the meantime, Jhoqi and Hilarious Hyena would hope they were enough to pwer the shield.
Meanwhile, back at the ranc, RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome were just maneuvering to land on Iohsw where they saw that the escape pod with Teddy and Turtle in it had landed. They exited the ship to find Teddy and his aaccomplices setting up some evil weeapon of doom. At this time Jhoi said to Hilarious Hyena, "The hole has arrived."
As RoboRabbit and the crew walked up to Teddy and Turtle, Upooq ran up to them and said, "We have no time. You can destroy his ship and yours to prevent escape, but we have not the time to battle him."
So they destroyed the ships and followed Upooq to Jhoqi's treehouse. With all the weeds everywhere, RoboRabbit wished he had a weedwhacker to make Iohsw devine. Unfortunately, they had neither the time nor the materials to rid the planet of all the unwanted vines, so they went straight to Jhoqi's abode and went downstairs to the room with Jhoqi in it while Upooq went out to save more people. RoboRabbit, Claudio McAwesome, and Costa Lxodi sat in the three remaining chairs to help power the shields with their awesomeness, and Upooq soon arrived with a crowd of people.
First entered Upooq, who had led them here
Then cam Armaninx without a hint of fear
Next entered Darkprint, her white tail wagging
And then Big Fat Husky, who seemed to be lagging
After that Green Wart Hog entered the hall
And last was Big Tall Moose, who could barely fit, he was so tall.
But no more animals came after that
For just after Big Tall Moose stepped on the mat
There came a great quake and a deadly explosion
Followed by tidals waves and an implosion
The people who hadn't yet entered all died
And from the explosion those living all shied
Those left had seen their planet's swift depredation
And, of the shield's strength, a good demonstration
"What is it?" questioned Upooq.
"It's a hole," replied Jhoqi promptly.
"What kind of hole?" asked Hilarious Hyena.
"It's a hole in our universal peace," said Jhoqi. "We must raise the emergency shields."
"Are you sure," asked Upooq, "those shields can only be raised once for a short amount of time."
"I am sure," she replied. "We must raise them quickly. Hurry!" Upooq quickly went downstairs to turn the powerful shields on.
"You and I must power the shields up with our awesomeness," said Jhoqi to Hilarious Hyena. "It must be as strong as possible to withstand the hole. Follow me."
Hilarious Hyena went with Jhoqi into a room that was directly above the room Upooq had gone to. The room was empty except for five chairs forming a circle in the middle. Hilarious Hyena and Jhoqi sat down in two of them. They soon felt the shields turn on, and they felt the energy in the room as they powered up the shields. The radius covered by the shields was not large, so Upooq would have to quickly find people and bring them into it to save them. In the meantime, Jhoqi and Hilarious Hyena would hope they were enough to pwer the shield.
Meanwhile, back at the ranc, RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome were just maneuvering to land on Iohsw where they saw that the escape pod with Teddy and Turtle in it had landed. They exited the ship to find Teddy and his aaccomplices setting up some evil weeapon of doom. At this time Jhoi said to Hilarious Hyena, "The hole has arrived."
As RoboRabbit and the crew walked up to Teddy and Turtle, Upooq ran up to them and said, "We have no time. You can destroy his ship and yours to prevent escape, but we have not the time to battle him."
So they destroyed the ships and followed Upooq to Jhoqi's treehouse. With all the weeds everywhere, RoboRabbit wished he had a weedwhacker to make Iohsw devine. Unfortunately, they had neither the time nor the materials to rid the planet of all the unwanted vines, so they went straight to Jhoqi's abode and went downstairs to the room with Jhoqi in it while Upooq went out to save more people. RoboRabbit, Claudio McAwesome, and Costa Lxodi sat in the three remaining chairs to help power the shields with their awesomeness, and Upooq soon arrived with a crowd of people.
First entered Upooq, who had led them here
Then cam Armaninx without a hint of fear
Next entered Darkprint, her white tail wagging
And then Big Fat Husky, who seemed to be lagging
After that Green Wart Hog entered the hall
And last was Big Tall Moose, who could barely fit, he was so tall.
But no more animals came after that
For just after Big Tall Moose stepped on the mat
There came a great quake and a deadly explosion
Followed by tidals waves and an implosion
The people who hadn't yet entered all died
And from the explosion those living all shied
Those left had seen their planet's swift depredation
And, of the shield's strength, a good demonstration
Sun Battles
RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome drove their spaceship toward Dohp, where they knew Turtle was headed. Costa Lxodi and Oapsuf manned the turrets for the upcoming battle and Platypus at there doing nothing. As they approached the planet they saw another ship, Turtle's stoled ship, take off. Everyone but Platypus prepared for battle. With only two people manning their ship, Turtle and Teddy were outmatched. Unfortunately they were smart enough to realize that they could only lose in open space battle, so Turtle rammed his ship directly into the side of RoboRabbit's stolen ship.
"Close the hatches," said RoboRabbit. Besides him, none of the crew could survive in the vacuum of space.
"I'm already on it," responded Claudio McAwesome.
"What should we do?" asked Oapsuf.
"They've caused grave damage to their ship. You and Costa Lxodi go meet them at the crash site. We'll clear you a path," said RoboRabbit. "And remember to grab suits!"
Oapsuf left the room and headed towards Turtle's stolen ship, Costa Lxodi following close behind. They wound through the halls and eventually made it to the site of Turtle's crashed stolen ship, where there was a gaping hole the size of something really big. They boarded the ship and searched the entire vehicle, then a light bulb appeared over Oapsuf's head.
"What?" asked Costa Lxodi.
"I just realized," said Oapsuf, "they could have entered our stolen ship while we were searching their stolen ship."
"You mean like a stolen ship swap?" asked Costa Lxodi.
"Yeah, an SSS!"
"Okay," said Costa Lxodi, "let's go back."
They reentered their ship and quickly went back towards the cockpit. They soon ran into Turtle and Teddy, who were sneaking their way through the halls. Costa Lxodi tackled Turtle and Oapsuf tackled Teddy. Teddy flipped over, got up and threw Oapsuf across the room, and Oapsuf bounced off the wall like a hyperactive person and flipped, landing on his feet on he ground. At the same time, Turtle went into his shell and spun, flinging Costa Lxodi off of him. Then Costa Lxodi reached into Turtle's shell and grabbed his tail, burning it and yanking it at the same time.
Oapsuf ran at Teddy from one side and Costa Lxodi threw Turtle at him from the other. Teddy dodged Turtle, letting him hit Oapsuf, and jumped at Costa Lxodi. Ignoring the heat, he flipp over Costa Lxodi and put him in a headlock. He then jumped and hit Costa Lxodi's head on the roof, knocking him unconscious. By then Turtle had joined him, so they decamped through the halls. Unfortunately, Claudio McAwesome had closed all the doors and locked them, so Turtle and Teddy boarded the nearest escape pod and fled.
"Close the hatches," said RoboRabbit. Besides him, none of the crew could survive in the vacuum of space.
"I'm already on it," responded Claudio McAwesome.
"What should we do?" asked Oapsuf.
"They've caused grave damage to their ship. You and Costa Lxodi go meet them at the crash site. We'll clear you a path," said RoboRabbit. "And remember to grab suits!"
Oapsuf left the room and headed towards Turtle's stolen ship, Costa Lxodi following close behind. They wound through the halls and eventually made it to the site of Turtle's crashed stolen ship, where there was a gaping hole the size of something really big. They boarded the ship and searched the entire vehicle, then a light bulb appeared over Oapsuf's head.
"What?" asked Costa Lxodi.
"I just realized," said Oapsuf, "they could have entered our stolen ship while we were searching their stolen ship."
"You mean like a stolen ship swap?" asked Costa Lxodi.
"Yeah, an SSS!"
"Okay," said Costa Lxodi, "let's go back."
They reentered their ship and quickly went back towards the cockpit. They soon ran into Turtle and Teddy, who were sneaking their way through the halls. Costa Lxodi tackled Turtle and Oapsuf tackled Teddy. Teddy flipped over, got up and threw Oapsuf across the room, and Oapsuf bounced off the wall like a hyperactive person and flipped, landing on his feet on he ground. At the same time, Turtle went into his shell and spun, flinging Costa Lxodi off of him. Then Costa Lxodi reached into Turtle's shell and grabbed his tail, burning it and yanking it at the same time.
Oapsuf ran at Teddy from one side and Costa Lxodi threw Turtle at him from the other. Teddy dodged Turtle, letting him hit Oapsuf, and jumped at Costa Lxodi. Ignoring the heat, he flipp over Costa Lxodi and put him in a headlock. He then jumped and hit Costa Lxodi's head on the roof, knocking him unconscious. By then Turtle had joined him, so they decamped through the halls. Unfortunately, Claudio McAwesome had closed all the doors and locked them, so Turtle and Teddy boarded the nearest escape pod and fled.
What Happens Next
"Oh, Costa Lxodi," said Armaninx, "I assume you got out of that ice block."
Costa Lxodi remained silent and walked past him to the hanger bay. Armaninx continued walking and bumped into Costa Lxodi again.
"I thought I just passed you," Armaninx said.
"I went back through a different hallway to get something I forgot," Costa Lxodi replied. Then he continued on to the hanger bay and Armaninx walked on. Then a suspicious worker dressed all in black carried some boxes labeled "This side up" past him. They had a arrow pointing down. Before he could say something to the worker, Platypus strolled past him.
"You dropped your pocket," he said, pointing at the ground. Armaninx bent and picked up his pocket, the he looked up and Platypus and the mysterious worker were gone. He reached a door that led outside and looked out.
"It's raining," he said.
"Would you like me to depose it?" asked Oapsuf, walking up.
"Wrong spelling," said Armaninx.
"Well, anyway, I came here for a reason," said Oapsuf. Then he promptly whacked Armaninx on the head, knocking him unconscious. He then ran back down the hall toward the hanger bay. He opened the door and walked out on a beach. Oapsuf walked over to the closet part of the bay and opened it to find the hanger. He got into the spaceship parked in the hanger and they took off, with Platypus driving.
"Where's RoboRabbit?" asked Armaninx, bursting into Jhoqi's home very rudely.
"In America," she replied.
"No games, Jhoqi. I want to know where all the main characters, and I want to know now."
"Love is patient. I know not where RoboRabbit has gone to now."
"If you won't give me an answer, I'll have to force it out of you."
"How? You're weapons are useless here."
"What about this super mega ultra weapon?" asked Armaninx.
"It's a hole" replied Jhoqi.
"We'll see about that!" Then he leaped at Jhoqi, pulling out his super mega ultra weapon. Just when he was about to collide with Jhoqi, a monkey intercepted him and a hyena wrested the super mega ultra weapon from him.
"I told you," repeated Jhoqi, "you're weapons are useless here."
"What about my fist?"
"It's a hole."
Then Armaninx charged the monkey. The hyena laughed and hit his arm. He threw the hyena across the room, where she landed on all fours and jumped back into the battle as soon as she could. While she did this, Armaninx tackled the monkey, who grabbed Armaninx's leg with his tail and tripped Armaninx. Then the hyena landed on him, pinning his arms and legs down with hers. The hyena laughed again.
"Who are you?" asked Armaninx.
"Hilarious Hyena, of course," she chuckled.
"And I am Upooq," said the monkey.
"Well, Hilarious Hyena," a laughing sound came fom the musicians in the sky, "and Upooq, you have bested me. Good job. Unfortunately, I have many guards outside waiting for my commands. Guards!"
"You have not to do this, Armaninx," said Jhoqi. "You know how hard it is for the author to write fight scenes!"
"I must do it," replied Armaninx as his guards streamed into the room. "Seize here," he commanded. As his guards continued to pour in, the ones at the front rushed at Jhoqi. There was a flash of light, and Hilarious Hena andd Upooq put up a brave fight, but they were outnumbered by more than twenty to two. Armaninx's guards soon overpowered them and seized Jhoqi. Then Armanix woke up. Apparently he had fallen asleep right there on the floor, and all of his guards were dead.
"You are more powerful than I thought," said Armaninx. "I'll be back."
Hilarious Hyena laughed.
Costa Lxodi remained silent and walked past him to the hanger bay. Armaninx continued walking and bumped into Costa Lxodi again.
"I thought I just passed you," Armaninx said.
"I went back through a different hallway to get something I forgot," Costa Lxodi replied. Then he continued on to the hanger bay and Armaninx walked on. Then a suspicious worker dressed all in black carried some boxes labeled "This side up" past him. They had a arrow pointing down. Before he could say something to the worker, Platypus strolled past him.
"You dropped your pocket," he said, pointing at the ground. Armaninx bent and picked up his pocket, the he looked up and Platypus and the mysterious worker were gone. He reached a door that led outside and looked out.
"It's raining," he said.
"Would you like me to depose it?" asked Oapsuf, walking up.
"Wrong spelling," said Armaninx.
"Well, anyway, I came here for a reason," said Oapsuf. Then he promptly whacked Armaninx on the head, knocking him unconscious. He then ran back down the hall toward the hanger bay. He opened the door and walked out on a beach. Oapsuf walked over to the closet part of the bay and opened it to find the hanger. He got into the spaceship parked in the hanger and they took off, with Platypus driving.
"Where's RoboRabbit?" asked Armaninx, bursting into Jhoqi's home very rudely.
"In America," she replied.
"No games, Jhoqi. I want to know where all the main characters, and I want to know now."
"Love is patient. I know not where RoboRabbit has gone to now."
"If you won't give me an answer, I'll have to force it out of you."
"How? You're weapons are useless here."
"What about this super mega ultra weapon?" asked Armaninx.
"It's a hole" replied Jhoqi.
"We'll see about that!" Then he leaped at Jhoqi, pulling out his super mega ultra weapon. Just when he was about to collide with Jhoqi, a monkey intercepted him and a hyena wrested the super mega ultra weapon from him.
"I told you," repeated Jhoqi, "you're weapons are useless here."
"What about my fist?"
"It's a hole."
Then Armaninx charged the monkey. The hyena laughed and hit his arm. He threw the hyena across the room, where she landed on all fours and jumped back into the battle as soon as she could. While she did this, Armaninx tackled the monkey, who grabbed Armaninx's leg with his tail and tripped Armaninx. Then the hyena landed on him, pinning his arms and legs down with hers. The hyena laughed again.
"Who are you?" asked Armaninx.
"Hilarious Hyena, of course," she chuckled.
"And I am Upooq," said the monkey.
"Well, Hilarious Hyena," a laughing sound came fom the musicians in the sky, "and Upooq, you have bested me. Good job. Unfortunately, I have many guards outside waiting for my commands. Guards!"
"You have not to do this, Armaninx," said Jhoqi. "You know how hard it is for the author to write fight scenes!"
"I must do it," replied Armaninx as his guards streamed into the room. "Seize here," he commanded. As his guards continued to pour in, the ones at the front rushed at Jhoqi. There was a flash of light, and Hilarious Hena andd Upooq put up a brave fight, but they were outnumbered by more than twenty to two. Armaninx's guards soon overpowered them and seized Jhoqi. Then Armanix woke up. Apparently he had fallen asleep right there on the floor, and all of his guards were dead.
"You are more powerful than I thought," said Armaninx. "I'll be back."
Hilarious Hyena laughed.
More Lore
Long ago,on the planet of Txase, a pact was made between four people. This pact was impossible to break, now matter how hard the participants tried, and it was, in essence, a truce. The pact was that none of the four involved would ever attack or battle each other at all. It was a pact of peace, and three of the people that made the pact have entered this story so far. One of them just came into the story. However, no matter how much research and remembering is done on my part, I still have no idea where the fourth person is at this point in the story. One of the three who have come into the story is RoboRabbit, but I will not yet tell you who the others are.
At this point in the story, you have no idea where RoboRabbit is or what the quack he is planning with Claudio McAwesome and Costa Lxodi. This obviously means that I am now going to tell the story from Armaninx's point of view. He has no idea where RoboRabbit is either, and he's found no trace of RoboRabbit with his search parties. So, let's see what happens next.
At this point in the story, you have no idea where RoboRabbit is or what the quack he is planning with Claudio McAwesome and Costa Lxodi. This obviously means that I am now going to tell the story from Armaninx's point of view. He has no idea where RoboRabbit is either, and he's found no trace of RoboRabbit with his search parties. So, let's see what happens next.
Coincidence
Claudio McAwesome and Costa Lxodi stepped out of the large puddle they found themselves in. The block of ice had somehow melted prematurely. Even with Costa Lxodi in it, the block of ice shouldn't have melted nearly as quickly. They were glad that it had, however, so they complained not about it and went straight to Jhoqi's house. They retrieved RoboRabbit from his hiding place in the underground treehouse and continued on with the next part in their master plan. As they ran though the grass, leaving a trail of flames behind, Claudio McAwesome's hat suddenly caught fire. She was far enough from Costa Lxodi that he hadn't caused it but the grass beneath her nevertheless caught fire as well.
The radius of flaming grass around her swelled until it was half the size of Costa Lxodi's. Then her hat burned off completely, and she was so hot that one could no longer see her, only the light she gave off. This was very weird, but also awesome and nifty, because it helped with their plan a great deal. Claudio McAwesome was no longer recognized as a VIP by anyone under Armaninx's command, considering she had left his empire long ago. Costa Lxodi, however, was still a member of Armaninx's innermost council, which would help a great deal with their plan suretainly.
The radius of flaming grass around her swelled until it was half the size of Costa Lxodi's. Then her hat burned off completely, and she was so hot that one could no longer see her, only the light she gave off. This was very weird, but also awesome and nifty, because it helped with their plan a great deal. Claudio McAwesome was no longer recognized as a VIP by anyone under Armaninx's command, considering she had left his empire long ago. Costa Lxodi, however, was still a member of Armaninx's innermost council, which would help a great deal with their plan suretainly.
Sacrifice
When Armaninx walked up to the block of ice that had once contained RoboRabbit, he was still dubious. RoboRabbit was no longer in the ice, and in his place were Claudio McAwesome and Costa Lxodi. Some time after the last battle, Claudio McAwesome had decided to live in the wild, easting plants and surviving on her knowledge. There were prints of RoboRabbit in the dirt, but there were also prints of a creature unknown to Armaninx. Just by the tracks of it, he could tell that it was female and that it was cuter than anything he had seen before. The tracks themselves mesmerized him and his guards for an immeasurable amount of time. They all felt a great urge to find the creature who had been here not long ago.
After a very long time, Armaninx finally said, "Let's follow these tracks. It shouldn't be too hard, and it should lead us to whoever assisted in this. Two of you stay here, no matter how difficult it is." What he left unspoken was the other reason for them to follow the tracks. They all wanted to meet she who assisted RoboRabbit, and the urge was so great that they couldn't leave until they followed the footprints and found her.
So they followed the graceful* tracks over the river and through the woods, but they turned left before reaching grandmother's house. The tracks suddenly stopped at the base of a thick tree. Armaninx tried slicing the tree, but he left no marks. He then tapped the place where the footprints ended, and a hollow noise resounded. He pushed open the door and stopped inside the odd treehouse.
"Stay outside," he told his guards, "I will investigate this alone." He went down a flight of stairs and found himself in an underground kitchen. There was a counter on part of the wall, with a sink and an oven powered by wood. A cabinet lined another section of the wall, which probably held large assortments of food. The rest of the circular wall was occupied by twenty-four small doors, all of which were identical. In the middle of the room was a table with two chairs, one of which contained a creature that was a mix of all the cute creatures known. There was guinea pig and hamster; tribble and pikachu; baby bird and puppy. The most dominant animals, however, were cat and bunny, which would explain her connection to RoboRabbit.
"Please, sit down, Armaninx," she said. He couldn't resist doing what she said because he was transfixed by her beauty. "I'm glad you left those nasty guards outside," she said as he took the chair opposite her.
"Where is RoboRabbit," Armaninx asked.
"Calm yourself, Armaninx," she replied. "Please, have some coffee." He took a cup that was on the table and drank. It was delicious.
"You know my name," he said sfter a pause, "but I know not what yours is."
"I am Jhoqi," she replied.
"Who are you?" he asked. "Why have I not seen you before?"
"I am a watcher, a listener, a healer, a maker. I watch the world in motion from my humble abode. I listen to the secrets of Iohsw in secret. I heal those who would otherwise die. I make wonders with the resources provided by nature. I have always been here, and if you had payed attention you would have seen me. I keep the planet from falling apart, as I am doing now."
"What are you doing now?"
"I have almost finished healing the one who can return this universe to normal, a prophesized in the Kukxi. The world is weird, Armaninx, and so are you. Everyone is weird andone person can return it to being somewhat normal."
"The One."
"That is correct."
"You know who it is?"
"Yes, and the answer to your next question is no."
"Well, who is it then?"
"None can know, for they will stop the One from fulfilling his or her destiny."
"Will you at least tell me where RoboRabbit is?"
"He was here not long ago. I will say that he is still on Iohsw."
"Thank you."
"Fare thee well on you journey," said Jhoqi, "for you will play an important role in saving the universe."
Armaninx went up the stairs and left the strange house. He then returnes to his castle and sent search parties for RoboRabbit.
After a very long time, Armaninx finally said, "Let's follow these tracks. It shouldn't be too hard, and it should lead us to whoever assisted in this. Two of you stay here, no matter how difficult it is." What he left unspoken was the other reason for them to follow the tracks. They all wanted to meet she who assisted RoboRabbit, and the urge was so great that they couldn't leave until they followed the footprints and found her.
So they followed the graceful* tracks over the river and through the woods, but they turned left before reaching grandmother's house. The tracks suddenly stopped at the base of a thick tree. Armaninx tried slicing the tree, but he left no marks. He then tapped the place where the footprints ended, and a hollow noise resounded. He pushed open the door and stopped inside the odd treehouse.
"Stay outside," he told his guards, "I will investigate this alone." He went down a flight of stairs and found himself in an underground kitchen. There was a counter on part of the wall, with a sink and an oven powered by wood. A cabinet lined another section of the wall, which probably held large assortments of food. The rest of the circular wall was occupied by twenty-four small doors, all of which were identical. In the middle of the room was a table with two chairs, one of which contained a creature that was a mix of all the cute creatures known. There was guinea pig and hamster; tribble and pikachu; baby bird and puppy. The most dominant animals, however, were cat and bunny, which would explain her connection to RoboRabbit.
"Please, sit down, Armaninx," she said. He couldn't resist doing what she said because he was transfixed by her beauty. "I'm glad you left those nasty guards outside," she said as he took the chair opposite her.
"Where is RoboRabbit," Armaninx asked.
"Calm yourself, Armaninx," she replied. "Please, have some coffee." He took a cup that was on the table and drank. It was delicious.
"You know my name," he said sfter a pause, "but I know not what yours is."
"I am Jhoqi," she replied.
"Who are you?" he asked. "Why have I not seen you before?"
"I am a watcher, a listener, a healer, a maker. I watch the world in motion from my humble abode. I listen to the secrets of Iohsw in secret. I heal those who would otherwise die. I make wonders with the resources provided by nature. I have always been here, and if you had payed attention you would have seen me. I keep the planet from falling apart, as I am doing now."
"What are you doing now?"
"I have almost finished healing the one who can return this universe to normal, a prophesized in the Kukxi. The world is weird, Armaninx, and so are you. Everyone is weird andone person can return it to being somewhat normal."
"The One."
"That is correct."
"You know who it is?"
"Yes, and the answer to your next question is no."
"Well, who is it then?"
"None can know, for they will stop the One from fulfilling his or her destiny."
"Will you at least tell me where RoboRabbit is?"
"He was here not long ago. I will say that he is still on Iohsw."
"Thank you."
"Fare thee well on you journey," said Jhoqi, "for you will play an important role in saving the universe."
Armaninx went up the stairs and left the strange house. He then returnes to his castle and sent search parties for RoboRabbit.
A Stolen Ship
"Armaninx, sir!" said an officer who burst into the room. "One of our ships has been stolen by an obviously experienced ninja."
"Well, let's find out who it was, officer. Go check RoboRabbit's grave and report whether he still occupies it. I will go check the security recordings."
"Yes, sir."
It had been about five years since the last battle, and the ice surrounding RoboRabbit had slowly melted an inch every year. As Armaninx walked through the halls toward the hanger bay he realized that this building closely resembled one he had seen in a movie. When he entered the hanger he went straight to the security room.
"Show me the security recordings," Armaninx ordered. The guard hurried to obey. On the screen there showed a video of a large ship with guards standing aroud it. The ship door suddenly opened, which took about thirty seconds. Once it had fully opened, it started closing. When there was just enough space to fit a comfortable chair through, Armaninx barely noticed a green blur in the opening, which he assumed was the ninja slipping into the ship. A few seconds later, the ship was started, although Armaninx saw nothing through the front windshield.
"Rewind to when the door was closing," commanded Armaninx. The guard did so, and then Armaninx told him to go frame by frame. When it got to the frame with the green blur that was barely noticeable, he said, "Stop. Zoom in on the opening." When the guard zoomed in Armaninx could barely make out part of a green shell.
"Turtle," he whispered.
"What?" asked the guard.
"Nothing. Have my ship prepared. I'm going after him."
Then the officer popped into the security room and said, "Armaninx, RoboRabbit's grave is occupied, but you're not going to believe what it's occupied by." Then the officer pulled out his high-definition digital camera and showed him a picture.
"Nevermind about the ship," said Armaninx, "I'm going to have to investigate this."
"Well, let's find out who it was, officer. Go check RoboRabbit's grave and report whether he still occupies it. I will go check the security recordings."
"Yes, sir."
It had been about five years since the last battle, and the ice surrounding RoboRabbit had slowly melted an inch every year. As Armaninx walked through the halls toward the hanger bay he realized that this building closely resembled one he had seen in a movie. When he entered the hanger he went straight to the security room.
"Show me the security recordings," Armaninx ordered. The guard hurried to obey. On the screen there showed a video of a large ship with guards standing aroud it. The ship door suddenly opened, which took about thirty seconds. Once it had fully opened, it started closing. When there was just enough space to fit a comfortable chair through, Armaninx barely noticed a green blur in the opening, which he assumed was the ninja slipping into the ship. A few seconds later, the ship was started, although Armaninx saw nothing through the front windshield.
"Rewind to when the door was closing," commanded Armaninx. The guard did so, and then Armaninx told him to go frame by frame. When it got to the frame with the green blur that was barely noticeable, he said, "Stop. Zoom in on the opening." When the guard zoomed in Armaninx could barely make out part of a green shell.
"Turtle," he whispered.
"What?" asked the guard.
"Nothing. Have my ship prepared. I'm going after him."
Then the officer popped into the security room and said, "Armaninx, RoboRabbit's grave is occupied, but you're not going to believe what it's occupied by." Then the officer pulled out his high-definition digital camera and showed him a picture.
"Nevermind about the ship," said Armaninx, "I'm going to have to investigate this."
Time Travel
When they lifted the giant ice cube off of the two enemies they saw what had happened. Alex was still alive and well and dashed away right when the ice was taken off of her, but RoboRabbit was completely frozen. It was impossible for him to still be alive when he was completely surrounded by his one and only weakness. so, Armaninx put everyone through the kotsupd that hadn't done it already. Then Costa Lxodi tried thawing RoboRabbit, but he was so frozen that even Costa Lxodi's heat couldn't thaw him. He was also frozen to the ground, so they couldn't move him from that exact spot.
The battle wasn't quite over, though. Alex had fled, but they still had to take on the rest of the squirrel army. After that they had to be sad that RoboRabbit died. When they were done with that, they started keeping the planet's empire intact. After much discussion, they decided on having Armaninx rule, because he had been with RoboRabbit the longest.
If you have seen many serieses on television, then you probably know that the most important rule in them is that the main character never dies. In fact, the shows kill off the main characters and bring them back wuite often. Well, you probably already guessed that that is what's happening here. What will be suspensful, however, is when he comes back. He could return at any moment, and you have idea when he will do so.
The battle wasn't quite over, though. Alex had fled, but they still had to take on the rest of the squirrel army. After that they had to be sad that RoboRabbit died. When they were done with that, they started keeping the planet's empire intact. After much discussion, they decided on having Armaninx rule, because he had been with RoboRabbit the longest.
If you have seen many serieses on television, then you probably know that the most important rule in them is that the main character never dies. In fact, the shows kill off the main characters and bring them back wuite often. Well, you probably already guessed that that is what's happening here. What will be suspensful, however, is when he comes back. He could return at any moment, and you have idea when he will do so.
[N]Ice Christmas
When RoboRabbit landed he continued his fight with Alex, but while Alex, RoboRabbit, Armaninx, and Claudio McAwesome were all on the gorund in the same spot, a giant ice cube came down from the sky, crushing all four of them. Claudio McAwesome was hot enough to melt her way out, and Armaninx used his mystic other-worldly powers, but Alex and RoboRabbit remained trapped beneath the ice. As you may recall, cold was RoboRabbit's one weakness, so his not coming out greatly concerned Claudio McAwesome and Armaninx. He had nothing to protect him from the coldness which surrounded him.
Now I feel, as everyone felt on that battlefield, that something special should happen in light of the holiday that is fast approaching as I write these words. So, everyone joined temporarily to sing a Christmas song which you most likely know not. It goes something like this, and by the chorus everyone has joined in the song:
Yeah, it's that time of year
An there'll be lots of Santa
But I'll take away the deer
Unless I get a Fanta
Yeah, I'll sing more and more
This music I will dish
And they will halt the war
For a peaceful Christmas wish
Oh, it's Christmas time on the battlefield
The weather is hot, the cold is sealed
It's Christmas time on the battlefield
And deadly presents shall be peeled
Yeah, the fighting will continue
After the celebration
And the losing side will go through
Their enemies ruling the nation
For now we'll join together
And sing this new Christmas song
And we won't mind the weather
For we shan't be here for long
Oh, it's Christmas time on the battlefield
After we're done we'll all be healed
It's Christmas time on the battlefield
The victor soon shall be revealed
It's the season of giving
The reason we're living
What we're looking forward to
So we're all celebrating
A break from decimating
An annual thing we do
I love Christmas
And everyone should too
But all of our gifts must
Be wasteful to you
We're not gathered
To celebrate this time
But we'd all rather
Sing this brand new rhyme
Now I feel, as everyone felt on that battlefield, that something special should happen in light of the holiday that is fast approaching as I write these words. So, everyone joined temporarily to sing a Christmas song which you most likely know not. It goes something like this, and by the chorus everyone has joined in the song:
Yeah, it's that time of year
An there'll be lots of Santa
But I'll take away the deer
Unless I get a Fanta
Yeah, I'll sing more and more
This music I will dish
And they will halt the war
For a peaceful Christmas wish
Oh, it's Christmas time on the battlefield
The weather is hot, the cold is sealed
It's Christmas time on the battlefield
And deadly presents shall be peeled
Yeah, the fighting will continue
After the celebration
And the losing side will go through
Their enemies ruling the nation
For now we'll join together
And sing this new Christmas song
And we won't mind the weather
For we shan't be here for long
Oh, it's Christmas time on the battlefield
After we're done we'll all be healed
It's Christmas time on the battlefield
The victor soon shall be revealed
It's the season of giving
The reason we're living
What we're looking forward to
So we're all celebrating
A break from decimating
An annual thing we do
I love Christmas
And everyone should too
But all of our gifts must
Be wasteful to you
We're not gathered
To celebrate this time
But we'd all rather
Sing this brand new rhyme
Who?
"RoboRabbit," said Armaninx finally, "the squirrel army is now led by. . . . . . Alex."
"Alex?"
"Alex?"
"Alex."
"Alex?"
"Alex."
"Alex?"
"Alex?"
"Alex?"
"Alex."
"Wait," said RoboRabbit finally. "Who's Alex?"
"You know not?" asked Armaninx. "Alex is the most unpredictable person we could possibly face. Surrounding her is a field of anti-logic. It defies logic at every turn, making her-"
"Alex is a woman?" interrupted Costa Lxodi.
"Yes," replied Armaninx, "and she has a field of anti-logic that-"
"A field of anti-logic," interrupted RoboRabbit. "That would explain why she has such a normal name, when all of ours are generraly random."
"Anyway," said Armaninx, "we must devise a plan to defeat Alex and her squirrel army."
"Alright," said RoboRabbit. "Let's get to it." So they devised a plan and cut out a door in their new living room floor. That accomplished nothing for their plan, but it was fun anyway.
"Okay," said Claudio McAwesome, "run the plan by me one more time so I know exactly how it goes."
"Okay," said RoboRabbit. "We prepare for battle. Then, we attack Alex and her army."
"Brilliant!" interjected Claudio McAwesome.
RoboRabbit activated his laser sword and gased upon the squirrel army that stood before him. Beside him were Claudio McAwesome and Armaninx, and he wouldn't have chosen anyone else to fight by his side. Then RoboRabbit's small group of awesome warriors rushed forward, charging right into the throng of squirrels. RoboRabbit, Claudio McAwesome, and Armaninx were in a group, while the rest of the people were spread out to distribute themselves evenly among the squirrels. There were two reasons they were in a gorup of three. First, of course, they would fight better together than apart. Also, it would take all three of them to defeat Alex, what with her unpredictable anit-logic.
The two sides clashed and RoboRabbit's side started pwning faces. Then RoboRabbit himself, along with Armaninx and Claudio McAwesome, forged his way straight toward Alex. Everyone shot at them as they ran through the crowd, and soon thay were near Alex. When the squirrels near Alex shot their guns a RoboRabbit, three of them shot ducks, two shot aglets, one flew up itno the sky, twenty-four just got that clicking noise a guna makes when out of ammunition (though they distinctly remembered loading them), and the rest of the guns disappeared in some way or another. Some of these turned into lamposts, some absurdly became squirrels, and others just rudely diappeared into thick air. RoboRabbit sliced some squirrels with his laser sword, but it went right through them and left no mark. Armaninx threw his boomerang, but it just went straight up and stayed there. Then Claudio McAwesome whipped her rubber band at one, and accidentally killed it.
RoboRabbit, Armaninx, and Claudio McAwesome all sighed in frustration, and their sighs put the squirrels to sleep. It was obvious that they wouldn't be able to fight normally in an anti-logic field. It was so obvious, in fact, that they realized it despite the anti-logic field hindering their thought process. So they proceeded to attack Alex in every way they could think of, whether it was poking her with a blade of grass or jumping on top of her violently. Alex, however, had spent her whole life in this field, and she used that to her advantage. With her experience, she blocked every one of their attacks and countered them with her own raondomness. When RoboRabbit was finally able to see around him, since the anti-logic had been blocking his view in one way or another the whole time, he saw that his teammates were completely slaughtereing the squirrels.
As RoboRabbit saw that they were winning awesomely, a giant pill landed in his face. Classic. Then he sprang up from the ground, which he hadn't been able to do before because he was in the air somewhere. I'm sorry to say that RoboRabbit still hadn't learned his lesson. For the third time in this story, he jumped up and ran directly into something. Remember to never jump somewhere if you aren't absolutely sure what you're jumping into. You might go into your dark bedroom and jump into your bed, only to find that someone replaced your bed with a pit of hungry wolves. And so it was with RoboRabbit and he ran into a flying sheep.
"Alex?"
"Alex?"
"Alex."
"Alex?"
"Alex."
"Alex?"
"Alex?"
"Alex?"
"Alex."
"Wait," said RoboRabbit finally. "Who's Alex?"
"You know not?" asked Armaninx. "Alex is the most unpredictable person we could possibly face. Surrounding her is a field of anti-logic. It defies logic at every turn, making her-"
"Alex is a woman?" interrupted Costa Lxodi.
"Yes," replied Armaninx, "and she has a field of anti-logic that-"
"A field of anti-logic," interrupted RoboRabbit. "That would explain why she has such a normal name, when all of ours are generraly random."
"Anyway," said Armaninx, "we must devise a plan to defeat Alex and her squirrel army."
"Alright," said RoboRabbit. "Let's get to it." So they devised a plan and cut out a door in their new living room floor. That accomplished nothing for their plan, but it was fun anyway.
"Okay," said Claudio McAwesome, "run the plan by me one more time so I know exactly how it goes."
"Okay," said RoboRabbit. "We prepare for battle. Then, we attack Alex and her army."
"Brilliant!" interjected Claudio McAwesome.
RoboRabbit activated his laser sword and gased upon the squirrel army that stood before him. Beside him were Claudio McAwesome and Armaninx, and he wouldn't have chosen anyone else to fight by his side. Then RoboRabbit's small group of awesome warriors rushed forward, charging right into the throng of squirrels. RoboRabbit, Claudio McAwesome, and Armaninx were in a group, while the rest of the people were spread out to distribute themselves evenly among the squirrels. There were two reasons they were in a gorup of three. First, of course, they would fight better together than apart. Also, it would take all three of them to defeat Alex, what with her unpredictable anit-logic.
The two sides clashed and RoboRabbit's side started pwning faces. Then RoboRabbit himself, along with Armaninx and Claudio McAwesome, forged his way straight toward Alex. Everyone shot at them as they ran through the crowd, and soon thay were near Alex. When the squirrels near Alex shot their guns a RoboRabbit, three of them shot ducks, two shot aglets, one flew up itno the sky, twenty-four just got that clicking noise a guna makes when out of ammunition (though they distinctly remembered loading them), and the rest of the guns disappeared in some way or another. Some of these turned into lamposts, some absurdly became squirrels, and others just rudely diappeared into thick air. RoboRabbit sliced some squirrels with his laser sword, but it went right through them and left no mark. Armaninx threw his boomerang, but it just went straight up and stayed there. Then Claudio McAwesome whipped her rubber band at one, and accidentally killed it.
RoboRabbit, Armaninx, and Claudio McAwesome all sighed in frustration, and their sighs put the squirrels to sleep. It was obvious that they wouldn't be able to fight normally in an anti-logic field. It was so obvious, in fact, that they realized it despite the anti-logic field hindering their thought process. So they proceeded to attack Alex in every way they could think of, whether it was poking her with a blade of grass or jumping on top of her violently. Alex, however, had spent her whole life in this field, and she used that to her advantage. With her experience, she blocked every one of their attacks and countered them with her own raondomness. When RoboRabbit was finally able to see around him, since the anti-logic had been blocking his view in one way or another the whole time, he saw that his teammates were completely slaughtereing the squirrels.
As RoboRabbit saw that they were winning awesomely, a giant pill landed in his face. Classic. Then he sprang up from the ground, which he hadn't been able to do before because he was in the air somewhere. I'm sorry to say that RoboRabbit still hadn't learned his lesson. For the third time in this story, he jumped up and ran directly into something. Remember to never jump somewhere if you aren't absolutely sure what you're jumping into. You might go into your dark bedroom and jump into your bed, only to find that someone replaced your bed with a pit of hungry wolves. And so it was with RoboRabbit and he ran into a flying sheep.
Pet Cockroaches
Part II: The Second Part
If you've ever had a pet cockroach, then you know exactly what it's like. There are times when your cockroach dies, and you perhaps even have a funeral for it. Then it turns out that the cockroach is still alive, so you rejoice and continue to care for it. A pet cockroach will seem to die quite often, but unless it went through a hot fire and all that's left of it are ashes, it will most likely survive. These turnings of events always leave one with mixed feelings of regret that you held a pointless cockroach funeral and joy that your cockroach lives. These are the feelings which RoboRabbit felt when Oapsuf opened the door to his office and stepped in."Sorry if I'm interrupting anything," said Oapsuf, "but my news is very urgent. There is an army of squirrels headed this way."
"Again?" replied RoboRabbit. "I thought we stranded Teddy on plant Dohp!"
"It isn't led by Teddy," responded Oapsuf.
Just then Armaninx burst in through the door saying, "I heard there's an army - Oapsuf?" I thought you died." "Yes, I died," confirmed Oapsuf, "but I-" He was interrupted by Darkprint jumping through the window.
"There's an army coming - what's Oapsuf doing here?" she said.
"That matters not," said Oapsuf. "What matters is that-"
"So," said Claudio McAwesome, breaking through the ceiling in a dramatic entrance, "the squirrels have returned. Oapsuf! You're alive!" She went over and hugged Oapsuf, feeling like the owner of a cockroach. As this happened, Platypus sprang up through the floor.
"I heard that the squirrels came back and I got over here as fast as I could," he said as everyone wondered how in the world he had come up through the floor. Just when it seemed like all the characters on RoboRabbit's side from the end of Part I were there, Costa Lxodi came out of RoboRabbit's pants [drawer]*. "So," he said, "we have all gathered together in a funny way against our enemies. Again. If I recall, most of us originally met in funny ways. Then again, I can't recall that since I was the second to last character to come into Part I. Anyway, we all gather against the squirrels, just like the first time. Hopefully it will end just like the first time as well, with us victorious. By the way, Platypus, Oapsuf is alive. You might as well freak out and make a big deal out of it."
*Remember, this is a children's story
Early Birdie
Claudio McAwesome maneuvered to land on Dohp. She was about to deploy the landing gear when Teddy, who had been tied up, jumped into her and knocked her off of the controls. He took them and crashed the ship quite brutally, totaling it. Claudio McAwesome got up and whacked him on the head. She brought him out of the ship and dropped him on the ground. Then she walked down to a nearby shuttle-bus, which everyone was on.
“RoboRabbit,” she said.
“Claudio McAwesome! You made it back here! Now you can help us get off this planet. Where's you're ship?”
“Teddy caused me to crash it. I brought him here to strand him on Dohp.”
“An excellent idea. Unfortunately, we cannot figure out how to get this shuttle-bus to move. It seems that you are stuck here too.”
“Nonsense,” replied Claudio McAwesome. “You selected a planet to go to, right?”
“Left,” confirmed RoboRabbit.
“Well, now we just have to power it.”
“How? There seems to be no fuel tank.”
“Have you ever thought of singing?” asked Claudio McAwesome. “I know it's a post-movie Spongebob reference, but it might work.”
“That would be very obvious. It's worth a shot.”
Then the music started playing. It is a song you might have heard before, with the same title as this chapter, and after a few measures, RoboRabbit began to sing, and the shuttle-bus lifted off and flew to Iohsw. And while I am not going to put the lyrics, please take a moment to listen to or sing this song before continuing on to the end of the chapter.
“Oapsuf!” cried Claudio McAwesome, rushing to him.
“It's no use,” said Oapsuf. “I must go.”
“No,” said RoboRabbit.
“What?” interjected Claudio McAwesome.
“If necessary, I can transfer my life into him,” replied RoboRabbit. “If you really want to live, Oapsuf, I can make it happen.”
“No,” said Claudio McAwesome. “You don't have to do this. You've got a planet to look after. You are needed.”
“The choice is yours,” said Oapsuf. “Only one of us can live. What will your choice be?”
“Live, RoboRabbit,” said Claudio McAwesome. “You must make the right decision here, not the left one.”
“RoboRabbit,” she said.
“Claudio McAwesome! You made it back here! Now you can help us get off this planet. Where's you're ship?”
“Teddy caused me to crash it. I brought him here to strand him on Dohp.”
“An excellent idea. Unfortunately, we cannot figure out how to get this shuttle-bus to move. It seems that you are stuck here too.”
“Nonsense,” replied Claudio McAwesome. “You selected a planet to go to, right?”
“Left,” confirmed RoboRabbit.
“Well, now we just have to power it.”
“How? There seems to be no fuel tank.”
“Have you ever thought of singing?” asked Claudio McAwesome. “I know it's a post-movie Spongebob reference, but it might work.”
“That would be very obvious. It's worth a shot.”
Then the music started playing. It is a song you might have heard before, with the same title as this chapter, and after a few measures, RoboRabbit began to sing, and the shuttle-bus lifted off and flew to Iohsw. And while I am not going to put the lyrics, please take a moment to listen to or sing this song before continuing on to the end of the chapter.
►▼◄
The shuttle-bus landed on Iohsw and the door opened. Then everyone and RoboRabbit got off, Costa Lxodi getting off first and backing some distance from the shuttle-bus so none would get burned. Then they all set out right for the castle that formerly belonged to Teddy so they could reclaim the planet from there. When they arrived they found Oapsuf covered in blood and close to death.“Oapsuf!” cried Claudio McAwesome, rushing to him.
“It's no use,” said Oapsuf. “I must go.”
“No,” said RoboRabbit.
“What?” interjected Claudio McAwesome.
“If necessary, I can transfer my life into him,” replied RoboRabbit. “If you really want to live, Oapsuf, I can make it happen.”
“No,” said Claudio McAwesome. “You don't have to do this. You've got a planet to look after. You are needed.”
“The choice is yours,” said Oapsuf. “Only one of us can live. What will your choice be?”
“Live, RoboRabbit,” said Claudio McAwesome. “You must make the right decision here, not the left one.”
Here ends Part I of this story
Good Evening Shuttle-Bus
The vehicle landed on Dohp, amazing RoboRabbit and the others. It was a public bus with rockets on the back. On the planet now were Armaninx, Darkprint, and Platypus, whom Teddy had also stranded there. They slowly walked up to it, wondering what the quack this shuttle-bus was doing here. It seemed that no one was in it. There was no sound or visible movement from inside. Costa Lxodi stepped closer and discovered that the shuttle-bus was heat-proof.
He opened the door and stepped inside. A few seconds later he came back out, confirming that it was empty. Everyone piled in, and RoboRabbit took the driver's seat. Costa Lxodi was in the passenger seat, since RoboRabbit was the only one there who could take the heat. RoboRabbit examined the dashboard and fond no starting mechanisms. In fact, there was nothing except a navigation system, which was used to select the planet you were traveling to. RoboRabbit selected Iohsw. Nothing happened.
RoboRabbit got out to check how much fuel was left, since there was no gauge on the dashboard either. He walked the full length of the shuttle-bus, but found nothing. The vehicle seemed to have no ways to put fuel into it at all. RoboRabbit even crawled underneath and found the bottom to be completely seamless. The only opening on the whole shuttle-bus was the door.
“It's quite clear,” said RoboRabbit, “that I'm stuck here.”
When they reached the ground, they opened the door and ran straight into an office, with a desk, with a chair, with a Teddy. Oapsuf jumped to the middle of the room, pulled out a sword, and was about to slice Teddy's head off when Claudio McAwesome stopped him.
“If you kill him,” she said, “you are no better than him. Let him live, and we can leave him on Dohp for the remainder of his life.”
Oapsuf agreed to this, so they knocked Teddy unconscious and began to carry him back with them. On the way back to their ship they met Green Wart Hog, Big Fat Husky, Big Tall Moose, and Tiny Chipmunk, who were all in favor of Teddy's rule. Claudio McAwesome jumped over Green Wart Hog and swhacked him with her tail. Oapsuf punched Big Fat Husky in the gut, jumped in the air, and kicked him. Big Tall Moose stepped on them both, and Tiny Chipmunk pointed her mega deadly laser at Claudio McAwesome. Then Oapsuf grabbed the leg that was on him and twisted it. Big Tall Moose started to fall down and landed on Tiny Chipmunk. Claudio McAwesome gut up and thwacked Green Wart Hog right on his noggin. Oapsuf jumped onto Big Tall Moose, who was on top of Tiny Chipmunk.
“Go,” he said. “I will make sure you are not followed.”
So Claudio McAwesome ran the rest of the way up the fire escape, carrying Teddy the whole way. When she reached the top, she went straight to the ship they had come on and flew to Dohp from there.
He opened the door and stepped inside. A few seconds later he came back out, confirming that it was empty. Everyone piled in, and RoboRabbit took the driver's seat. Costa Lxodi was in the passenger seat, since RoboRabbit was the only one there who could take the heat. RoboRabbit examined the dashboard and fond no starting mechanisms. In fact, there was nothing except a navigation system, which was used to select the planet you were traveling to. RoboRabbit selected Iohsw. Nothing happened.
RoboRabbit got out to check how much fuel was left, since there was no gauge on the dashboard either. He walked the full length of the shuttle-bus, but found nothing. The vehicle seemed to have no ways to put fuel into it at all. RoboRabbit even crawled underneath and found the bottom to be completely seamless. The only opening on the whole shuttle-bus was the door.
“It's quite clear,” said RoboRabbit, “that I'm stuck here.”
►▼◄
Claudio McAwesome and Oapsuf quickly sneaked down the dark metal shape of the rusty fire escape. Oapsuf had decided to help Claudio McAwesome in restoring order to Iohsw. They were now headed straight to Teddy's office to end his rule. He had controlled the planet long enough.When they reached the ground, they opened the door and ran straight into an office, with a desk, with a chair, with a Teddy. Oapsuf jumped to the middle of the room, pulled out a sword, and was about to slice Teddy's head off when Claudio McAwesome stopped him.
“If you kill him,” she said, “you are no better than him. Let him live, and we can leave him on Dohp for the remainder of his life.”
Oapsuf agreed to this, so they knocked Teddy unconscious and began to carry him back with them. On the way back to their ship they met Green Wart Hog, Big Fat Husky, Big Tall Moose, and Tiny Chipmunk, who were all in favor of Teddy's rule. Claudio McAwesome jumped over Green Wart Hog and swhacked him with her tail. Oapsuf punched Big Fat Husky in the gut, jumped in the air, and kicked him. Big Tall Moose stepped on them both, and Tiny Chipmunk pointed her mega deadly laser at Claudio McAwesome. Then Oapsuf grabbed the leg that was on him and twisted it. Big Tall Moose started to fall down and landed on Tiny Chipmunk. Claudio McAwesome gut up and thwacked Green Wart Hog right on his noggin. Oapsuf jumped onto Big Tall Moose, who was on top of Tiny Chipmunk.
“Go,” he said. “I will make sure you are not followed.”
So Claudio McAwesome ran the rest of the way up the fire escape, carrying Teddy the whole way. When she reached the top, she went straight to the ship they had come on and flew to Dohp from there.
The One
The planet Iohsw was not always known by that name. What Commander Actnon hadn't anticipated was that his secret weapon altered more than just the people on that battlefield. Indeed, it actually altered the entire universe, creating an alternate universe. It changed many plants, moved many lifeforms, and made every living thing into a walkable, talkable animal. It also transformed every book into the same book, called the Kukxi, which foretold all the important events that would happen in this universe.
The Kukxi foretold that one person would come and return the universe to what it previously was. It said not what this person looked like or what their name was, only that they were a great warrior. It was told that this person was the most awesomest person in the universe, and they would sacrifice themselves to restore the entire universe. It was not said what animal they were, nor whether they were male or female.
The changing of the universe would, of course, affect everyone everywhere. The universe would go back to being exactly as it was then the universe changed. Everyone would lose memory of the universe in which they were animals, except for one person. The person who restores the universe is known as the One, and the being who remembers it is the Two. The Two is said to be the One's partner. They are both great fighters and gentle animals. They work together to defend that which they believe is right and the Two aids the One in restoring the universe.
The Two is the only being who remembers what the universe was like before, and when the restoration occurs, they are formed into a newborn child, as they were when the change occurred. As the Two progresses through “normal” life, he/she slowly begins to remember the changed universe.
The Two, however, is intelligent enough to realize that none of the humans, probably not even the One, will believe the tale. So they pretend not to believe it either. All their life the Two claims that this story is not true, and their life is very long. The Two spends his or her life on Iohsw, which will then be known by a different name, helping to make people immortal. They go back to the beginning of time and influence the history of the planet. They learn how to make people immortal after 4,000 years of watching history, and continue making people immortal their whole life. He/she changes his/her appearance and name every so often and makes people think he/she dies, so they won't know of the immortality. Anyway, the One is the person Claudio McAwesome searches for, and she will eventually discover who the One is.
The Kukxi foretold that one person would come and return the universe to what it previously was. It said not what this person looked like or what their name was, only that they were a great warrior. It was told that this person was the most awesomest person in the universe, and they would sacrifice themselves to restore the entire universe. It was not said what animal they were, nor whether they were male or female.
The changing of the universe would, of course, affect everyone everywhere. The universe would go back to being exactly as it was then the universe changed. Everyone would lose memory of the universe in which they were animals, except for one person. The person who restores the universe is known as the One, and the being who remembers it is the Two. The Two is said to be the One's partner. They are both great fighters and gentle animals. They work together to defend that which they believe is right and the Two aids the One in restoring the universe.
The Two is the only being who remembers what the universe was like before, and when the restoration occurs, they are formed into a newborn child, as they were when the change occurred. As the Two progresses through “normal” life, he/she slowly begins to remember the changed universe.
The Two, however, is intelligent enough to realize that none of the humans, probably not even the One, will believe the tale. So they pretend not to believe it either. All their life the Two claims that this story is not true, and their life is very long. The Two spends his or her life on Iohsw, which will then be known by a different name, helping to make people immortal. They go back to the beginning of time and influence the history of the planet. They learn how to make people immortal after 4,000 years of watching history, and continue making people immortal their whole life. He/she changes his/her appearance and name every so often and makes people think he/she dies, so they won't know of the immortality. Anyway, the One is the person Claudio McAwesome searches for, and she will eventually discover who the One is.
Against All Odds
As RoboRabbit stared into the sky he saw a shooting star fly across it. He wished for someone who could take him off of this quacking planet. Then the shooting star landed nearby. It was Costa Lxodi, the legendary hero who follows the Jexblupw Puxnih wherever it takes him. Just as he stood up, a missile from somewhere above hit him.
“Cowrap,” said Costa Lxodi. “That was my only jet-pack.” He walked over to RoboRabbit. “I have come to rescue you, roborabbit, but appariously I have simply stranded myself here with you. We shall have to wait for another way off of this planet. I will consult my Jexblupw Puxnih as to what we should do next.”
Fortunately for them, only one thing could ever penetrate RoboRabbit's skin. Thus he was able to approach Costa Lxodi without his heart melting. So they both waited, and waited, and waited. It was a good thing Costa Lxodi had plenty of Jexblupw which he could eat to survive for a while.
“Excuse me,” said Armaninx to the receptionist, who also hit them both as they walked in, “can I talk to Teddy? I've come to kill him.”
“Hold on one second,” said the receptionist in a stereotypical voice. Then she pressed a button and said, “Your lordship, there are some evil warriors here to kill you.”
“Send them in,” came Teddy's reply.
Then the receptionist directed them to Teddy's office, where they went in directly. Once inside, Teddy told them to have a seat.
“I had expected that you would come to visit me,” said Teddy. “I just wasn't expecting you until next week. There must have been good traffic.”
“Traffic is almost never goo,” said Platypus as he walked in, “just like Windows Vista.”
“I thought for a second you hadn't brought that egg-laying mammal of action,” said Teddy. “I guess that's what I get for assuming things.”
“Enough talk,” replied Armaninx. “Let's get down to business. I believe you know why we came here. Let's just get on with it.”
“Actually,” responded Teddy, “I have no idea why you came here. You have no cause to dislike me, and I have none to dislike you.”
“Incorrect,” countered Armaninx. “I have very cause to dislike you. You stranded RoboRabbit, banished us, and took control of our land!”
“I have a good reason for everything,” said Teddy. “RoboRabbit was not good for this planet, and I was. Would you rather have him stay and everyone die slaves, or have him leave and everyone be free? As for you, you were opposed to me. Had you not been against me wholeheartedly, I would have allowed you to stay.”
“RoboRabbit was and is more powerful than you. And so are we. We are better than you even more than Apple products are better than Microsoft ones*!”
“That's impossible,” said Teddy, with a slight hint of fear. “No one can be that much better than me. Especially not an alien, a pony, and a duck!”
This so enraged Darkprint and Platypus that they simultaneously charged at Teddy. Armaninx had no choice but to join in the charge. Teddy jumped in the air and kicked Darkprint's face. Then he whirled around and wrapped his wail around her body. He did a slow motion back flip as he landed, flinging her to the other side of the room. Armaninx tripped him onto the ground and stepped on his chest. He grabbed Armaninx's ankle and twisted it, then swung Armaninx over to a wall, where he landed on a bookshelf. As Teddy got up, Platypus injected him with venom from one of his spurs.
“I'm not a duck,” he said. “I'm a platypus.” Then he punched Teddy's face. Teddy spun in a circle, jumping into the air as he did so, and kicked Darkprint and Armaninx, who were just returning to the battle. He jumped again and landed on Darkprint, then he pulled out some chains and bound her front and hind legs. Armaninx and Platypus jumped over most of the room and landed on top of Teddy. Teddy punched Platypus in the face, and Armaninx kneed him in the back.
“You kneed me,” coughed Teddy.
“We will never need you,” punned Armaninx. Teddy kicked him in the man parts as he said this, then quickly chained Armaninx to the ground. Platypus injected Teddy with venom a second time, and Teddy tripped him. As he did so, he cut himself on one of Platypus's spurs, getting venom into his system a third time. Teddy quickly chained Platypus up and limped out of the room.
*Yes, I went there.
“Cowrap,” said Costa Lxodi. “That was my only jet-pack.” He walked over to RoboRabbit. “I have come to rescue you, roborabbit, but appariously I have simply stranded myself here with you. We shall have to wait for another way off of this planet. I will consult my Jexblupw Puxnih as to what we should do next.”
Fortunately for them, only one thing could ever penetrate RoboRabbit's skin. Thus he was able to approach Costa Lxodi without his heart melting. So they both waited, and waited, and waited. It was a good thing Costa Lxodi had plenty of Jexblupw which he could eat to survive for a while.
►▼◄
Armaninx just kept on walking, despite being hit by every person in the crowd he swam through. Darkprint followed close behind, also getting whacked by every person she passed. Both Armaninx and Darkprint had but one “weakness,” meaning there was only one way to kill them. Thus the multitudes of people rudely smiting them caused no damage at all, though it still hurt. They were going to follow in RoboRabbit's footsteps and take over the entire world.“Excuse me,” said Armaninx to the receptionist, who also hit them both as they walked in, “can I talk to Teddy? I've come to kill him.”
“Hold on one second,” said the receptionist in a stereotypical voice. Then she pressed a button and said, “Your lordship, there are some evil warriors here to kill you.”
“Send them in,” came Teddy's reply.
Then the receptionist directed them to Teddy's office, where they went in directly. Once inside, Teddy told them to have a seat.
“I had expected that you would come to visit me,” said Teddy. “I just wasn't expecting you until next week. There must have been good traffic.”
“Traffic is almost never goo,” said Platypus as he walked in, “just like Windows Vista.”
“I thought for a second you hadn't brought that egg-laying mammal of action,” said Teddy. “I guess that's what I get for assuming things.”
“Enough talk,” replied Armaninx. “Let's get down to business. I believe you know why we came here. Let's just get on with it.”
“Actually,” responded Teddy, “I have no idea why you came here. You have no cause to dislike me, and I have none to dislike you.”
“Incorrect,” countered Armaninx. “I have very cause to dislike you. You stranded RoboRabbit, banished us, and took control of our land!”
“I have a good reason for everything,” said Teddy. “RoboRabbit was not good for this planet, and I was. Would you rather have him stay and everyone die slaves, or have him leave and everyone be free? As for you, you were opposed to me. Had you not been against me wholeheartedly, I would have allowed you to stay.”
“RoboRabbit was and is more powerful than you. And so are we. We are better than you even more than Apple products are better than Microsoft ones*!”
“That's impossible,” said Teddy, with a slight hint of fear. “No one can be that much better than me. Especially not an alien, a pony, and a duck!”
This so enraged Darkprint and Platypus that they simultaneously charged at Teddy. Armaninx had no choice but to join in the charge. Teddy jumped in the air and kicked Darkprint's face. Then he whirled around and wrapped his wail around her body. He did a slow motion back flip as he landed, flinging her to the other side of the room. Armaninx tripped him onto the ground and stepped on his chest. He grabbed Armaninx's ankle and twisted it, then swung Armaninx over to a wall, where he landed on a bookshelf. As Teddy got up, Platypus injected him with venom from one of his spurs.
“I'm not a duck,” he said. “I'm a platypus.” Then he punched Teddy's face. Teddy spun in a circle, jumping into the air as he did so, and kicked Darkprint and Armaninx, who were just returning to the battle. He jumped again and landed on Darkprint, then he pulled out some chains and bound her front and hind legs. Armaninx and Platypus jumped over most of the room and landed on top of Teddy. Teddy punched Platypus in the face, and Armaninx kneed him in the back.
“You kneed me,” coughed Teddy.
“We will never need you,” punned Armaninx. Teddy kicked him in the man parts as he said this, then quickly chained Armaninx to the ground. Platypus injected Teddy with venom a second time, and Teddy tripped him. As he did so, he cut himself on one of Platypus's spurs, getting venom into his system a third time. Teddy quickly chained Platypus up and limped out of the room.
*Yes, I went there.
Good Guy
It had been nearly month of Teddy ruling Iohsw, and the planet was already flourishing. Teddy was a great leader. He was nice, just, strong, and smart. He knew exactly what he was doing and everyone on the planet liked him, except for two. Armaninx and Darkprint were obviously planning to depose him. They had invented a sacred ritual called kotsupd. The purpose of it was to make the person it was done upon nearly immortal. They had discovered that the inter-dimensional space where one battles Death is outside of time and space. The ritual involved walking through a pillar of fire, and the workings of it were extremely complex and difficult to grasp, so I won't try to explain it to you. Armaninx and Darkprint both went through kotsupds and became almost immortal.
They were now ready to do what RoboRabbit had done: Take over the world. They set out immediately on their long journey from Blokushneka to Eggsaladasia. On the way there they encountered Platypus, who decided to help them on their expedition. When they arrived at the shore, after crossing the ocean surrounding the island of Blokushneka, they found guard towers all along the shoreline. Teddy had obviously been anticipated that they would come back. He probably had no idea, however, that they had both had kotsupds.
The three of them quickly disassembled a few towers and walked past them to the forest beyond. They decided to go around, lest they get lost like so many had before. Skirting the forest took three days, but after they were finished it looked very pretty. During those three days they battled many patrols, and afterward, they set themselves on a path straight to Teddy's castle. They would have to kill him themselves if no one else would do it.
They were now ready to do what RoboRabbit had done: Take over the world. They set out immediately on their long journey from Blokushneka to Eggsaladasia. On the way there they encountered Platypus, who decided to help them on their expedition. When they arrived at the shore, after crossing the ocean surrounding the island of Blokushneka, they found guard towers all along the shoreline. Teddy had obviously been anticipated that they would come back. He probably had no idea, however, that they had both had kotsupds.
The three of them quickly disassembled a few towers and walked past them to the forest beyond. They decided to go around, lest they get lost like so many had before. Skirting the forest took three days, but after they were finished it looked very pretty. During those three days they battled many patrols, and afterward, they set themselves on a path straight to Teddy's castle. They would have to kill him themselves if no one else would do it.
Okay
If you have actually managed to read this story thus far, then congratulations. You have now reached a point in the story where even I have no idea what happens next. Three characters are in outer space, not to mention Oapsuf, and the rest are on Iohsw. So, I've decided (partially because of writer's block) to explain a few things here.
First of all, if you know not yet, know that all of the main characters were based on people in real life, as well as any characters that will later enter the story. Now, most writers would put a chapter like this at the end of the story, but I'm not most writers. Besides, if I do that then only half of the people who read this story will actually read it.
Now I will tell you what some of the characters are like. RoboRabbit is based off of me, and by the end of this story all of my siblings will be in this story as well. Big Tall Moose was always known for being tall, as demonstrated in the story. Armaninx, Green Wart Hog, and I were once three amigos, very long ago. Unfortunately, Green Wart Hog left and now we're just a dynamic duo.
As some readers may have noticed, I felt it necessary to introduce some female characters into the story, so I brought in a striped possum. Claudio McAwesome was based upon the most awesome person I knew as I wrote that part of the story, which is why she is described as the most beautiful character. Darkprint then came into play so that I might eventually reach a balance of male and female characters.
Platypus, as you may have noticed, is the main comic relief. He fits into no category, and he is one of the few people I know who loves Spongebob anywhere near as much as I. Teddy is obviously the main enemy, and he is, basically, a Trekkie. He's one of the people one expects to know random facts.
Costa Lxodi is the hottest character in this story, because he is the hottest person on Earth in reality. Costa Lxodi, in the language of the bunnies, means “Flaming Costa.” You may notice many words in the bunny language (properly called Lapine) besides just this one, such as Pshom Paqyufj, which means “Straw of Sucking.” Now you can go back to the main plot. I just may have another of these chapters later on, so be as prepared as a mountain goat.
First of all, if you know not yet, know that all of the main characters were based on people in real life, as well as any characters that will later enter the story. Now, most writers would put a chapter like this at the end of the story, but I'm not most writers. Besides, if I do that then only half of the people who read this story will actually read it.
Now I will tell you what some of the characters are like. RoboRabbit is based off of me, and by the end of this story all of my siblings will be in this story as well. Big Tall Moose was always known for being tall, as demonstrated in the story. Armaninx, Green Wart Hog, and I were once three amigos, very long ago. Unfortunately, Green Wart Hog left and now we're just a dynamic duo.
As some readers may have noticed, I felt it necessary to introduce some female characters into the story, so I brought in a striped possum. Claudio McAwesome was based upon the most awesome person I knew as I wrote that part of the story, which is why she is described as the most beautiful character. Darkprint then came into play so that I might eventually reach a balance of male and female characters.
Platypus, as you may have noticed, is the main comic relief. He fits into no category, and he is one of the few people I know who loves Spongebob anywhere near as much as I. Teddy is obviously the main enemy, and he is, basically, a Trekkie. He's one of the people one expects to know random facts.
Costa Lxodi is the hottest character in this story, because he is the hottest person on Earth in reality. Costa Lxodi, in the language of the bunnies, means “Flaming Costa.” You may notice many words in the bunny language (properly called Lapine) besides just this one, such as Pshom Paqyufj, which means “Straw of Sucking.” Now you can go back to the main plot. I just may have another of these chapters later on, so be as prepared as a mountain goat.
Deforestation
About an hour after Costa Lxodi left–after Armaninx, Big Tall Moose, and Tiny Chipmunk were done clearing the mess he had accidentally made upon landing–Green Wart Hog, Darkprint, and Big Fat Husky arrived and told their tale. It greatly saddened Armaninx that they had chopped so many trees from the great forest, but it could not be helped.
Just then, a large spaceship landed in a nearby field. As the dust cleared, the musicians in the sky played suspenseful dramatic music. The hatch opened, and out stepped Teddy. Then Armaninx recognized the ship as RoboRabbit's and realized that Teddy must have stolen it.
“What have you done with RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome?” demanded Armaninx.
“Claudio McAwesome,” replied Teddy, “left the planet in a third ship. As for RoboRabbit, well. . . I left him as he left me: Alone to fend for himself. He will hopefully learn his lesson. In the meantime, I will ally with you guys if you agree to bring the squirrels back into the kingdom.”
“Sounds like a plan to me,” said Green Wart Hog promptly. “Let's ally.”
“No way,” said Armaninx.
“I think we should ally with him,” said Big Fat Husky.
“Come on guys,” said Darkprint, “RoboRabbit must have banished the squirrels for a reason.”
Unfortunately, no one but Darkprint agreed with Armaninx. So, Teddy became ruler and banished Armaninx and Darkprint to Blokushneka, where the squirrels had been, for the remainder of their lives. Armaninx hoped that Costa Lxodi wouldn't take too long to bring RoboRabbit back. He also hoped that Claudio McAwesome would make it back to Iohsw. Speaking of which, here's a part of Claudio McAwesome now!
“So,” said Oapsuf, a <insert animal here> who had sort of kidnapped Claudio McAwesome, “you know RoboRabbit?”
“Yes, what of it?” responded Claudio McAwesome.
“Well, I once did something kind of wrong to him and later payed him back. Then we signed a treaty and you could say that we are now allies.”
“Why have you taken me away from Dohp? I still haven't completed the mission I first set out on.”
“Ah yes, finding the One. Let me guess, you believe RoboRabbit is the One.”
“Yes, actually. He shows all the signs of being the One.”
“And what of me?” asked Oapsuf. “I have the qualities of the One.”
“Yes, Oapsuf, you could be the One. I'm still gathering the information I need, but so far it is more likely that you are the One.”
“That's good to hear. I'm glad you still like me somewhat.”
Just then, a large spaceship landed in a nearby field. As the dust cleared, the musicians in the sky played suspenseful dramatic music. The hatch opened, and out stepped Teddy. Then Armaninx recognized the ship as RoboRabbit's and realized that Teddy must have stolen it.
“What have you done with RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome?” demanded Armaninx.
“Claudio McAwesome,” replied Teddy, “left the planet in a third ship. As for RoboRabbit, well. . . I left him as he left me: Alone to fend for himself. He will hopefully learn his lesson. In the meantime, I will ally with you guys if you agree to bring the squirrels back into the kingdom.”
“Sounds like a plan to me,” said Green Wart Hog promptly. “Let's ally.”
“No way,” said Armaninx.
“I think we should ally with him,” said Big Fat Husky.
“Come on guys,” said Darkprint, “RoboRabbit must have banished the squirrels for a reason.”
Unfortunately, no one but Darkprint agreed with Armaninx. So, Teddy became ruler and banished Armaninx and Darkprint to Blokushneka, where the squirrels had been, for the remainder of their lives. Armaninx hoped that Costa Lxodi wouldn't take too long to bring RoboRabbit back. He also hoped that Claudio McAwesome would make it back to Iohsw. Speaking of which, here's a part of Claudio McAwesome now!
“So,” said Oapsuf, a <insert animal here> who had sort of kidnapped Claudio McAwesome, “you know RoboRabbit?”
“Yes, what of it?” responded Claudio McAwesome.
“Well, I once did something kind of wrong to him and later payed him back. Then we signed a treaty and you could say that we are now allies.”
“Why have you taken me away from Dohp? I still haven't completed the mission I first set out on.”
“Ah yes, finding the One. Let me guess, you believe RoboRabbit is the One.”
“Yes, actually. He shows all the signs of being the One.”
“And what of me?” asked Oapsuf. “I have the qualities of the One.”
“Yes, Oapsuf, you could be the One. I'm still gathering the information I need, but so far it is more likely that you are the One.”
“That's good to hear. I'm glad you still like me somewhat.”
Goldfish
When Armaninx finally met back with Big Tall Moose and Tiny Chipmunk at the main castle, they figured they could rest for a while after all that hard work. Unfortunately for them, it was not as simple as that. Just when they thought their troubles were over, a ball of fire fell from the sky and landed directly to one side of the castle. Luckily, they had heatproof suits prepared for such an occasion. They put on these suits of the most heat resistant material known, and it was a good thing they did so, because this particular “fireball” was actually the hottest thing in the entire universe.
When they went to examine the site, they discovered that it was no fireball. It was a man. In fact, it was the hottest man ever: Costa Lxodi (the X is silent).
“Greetings,” said Costa Lxodi. “My name it Costa Lxodi. Who would you be?”
“I am Armaninx,” said Armaninx, “the temporary ruler of this planet. These are my companions, Big Tall Moose and Tiny Chipmunk.”
“Well met indeed,” said Costa Lxodi. “How exactly are our a temporary ruler?”
“RoboRabbit, the real leader, is off somewhere in space battling our most recent enemy.”
“And when will this roborabbit be back?” asked Costa Lxodi.
“I have no idea. By the way, you are supposed to capitalize the R's in RoboRabbit.”
“I'll say it how I want,” replied Costa Lxodi, “and I see no big difference between RoboRabbit and roborabbit, except that the first one is harder to write in cursive. And since this story is being written in cursive, I'll save the writer the trouble by not capitalizing roborabbit at all.”
Then Costa Lxodi proceeded to explain why he was there. “You see,” he said, “I have a trinket called the Jexblupw Puxnih, a special goldfish which tells me what I am supposed to do next. It's helped me save a great deal of people, and now I think roborabbit needs saving. You see, the Jexblupw Puxnih recently told me to help the leader of this planet get back to Iohsw. I think roborabbit may have gotten lost somewhere, so I will soon depart and try to find him.”
“Well,” said Armaninx, “if this is true, then we are very glad that you have come. I'm sure that, if anyone, someone as hot as you is very qualified for such a mission. If you want, one of my companions could travel with you.”
“No,” replied Costa Lxodi. “This is my quest, and mine alone.” Big Tall Moose and Tiny Chipmunk were glad to hear this, because they surely wouldn't be able to stand the heat emanating from Costa Lxodi for that long. Then Costa Lxodi flew back into the sky to rescue RoboRabbit from whatever peril he was in. And by the way he's right, roborabbit is easier to write.
When they went to examine the site, they discovered that it was no fireball. It was a man. In fact, it was the hottest man ever: Costa Lxodi (the X is silent).
“Greetings,” said Costa Lxodi. “My name it Costa Lxodi. Who would you be?”
“I am Armaninx,” said Armaninx, “the temporary ruler of this planet. These are my companions, Big Tall Moose and Tiny Chipmunk.”
“Well met indeed,” said Costa Lxodi. “How exactly are our a temporary ruler?”
“RoboRabbit, the real leader, is off somewhere in space battling our most recent enemy.”
“And when will this roborabbit be back?” asked Costa Lxodi.
“I have no idea. By the way, you are supposed to capitalize the R's in RoboRabbit.”
“I'll say it how I want,” replied Costa Lxodi, “and I see no big difference between RoboRabbit and roborabbit, except that the first one is harder to write in cursive. And since this story is being written in cursive, I'll save the writer the trouble by not capitalizing roborabbit at all.”
Then Costa Lxodi proceeded to explain why he was there. “You see,” he said, “I have a trinket called the Jexblupw Puxnih, a special goldfish which tells me what I am supposed to do next. It's helped me save a great deal of people, and now I think roborabbit needs saving. You see, the Jexblupw Puxnih recently told me to help the leader of this planet get back to Iohsw. I think roborabbit may have gotten lost somewhere, so I will soon depart and try to find him.”
“Well,” said Armaninx, “if this is true, then we are very glad that you have come. I'm sure that, if anyone, someone as hot as you is very qualified for such a mission. If you want, one of my companions could travel with you.”
“No,” replied Costa Lxodi. “This is my quest, and mine alone.” Big Tall Moose and Tiny Chipmunk were glad to hear this, because they surely wouldn't be able to stand the heat emanating from Costa Lxodi for that long. Then Costa Lxodi flew back into the sky to rescue RoboRabbit from whatever peril he was in. And by the way he's right, roborabbit is easier to write.
Straw
Green Wart Hog, big Fat Husky, and Darkprint wandered through the forest. They had been walking around, searching for an end to the forest, for weeks now. They had at least defeated Teddy on this world, but it seemed that he had wanted them to do so because they would then be lost in this forest. They could only hope that RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome had found and defeated Teddy in space.
“Well,” said Darkprint, “it seems to me that wandering through the forest won't get us anywhere.”
“What were you thinking we should do?” asked Big Fat Husky.
“How about we start chopping tress? That way is we go back to a place we've been, we'll know we've been there because the trees are chopped down.”
“Sounds like a plan to me,” said Green Wart Hog. So they fashioned some axes out of trees and rocks, and they started chopping trees.
Now Armaninx had given Green Wart Hog the Pshom Paqyufj, an enchanted straw that, when blown upon, would create a noise heard by everyone on planet Iohsw. He was to use it as a signal that they had defeated Teddy. He had already used it, so Armaninx knew that they had won. None were sure when RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome would return, so Armaninx, Big Tall Moose, and Tiny Chipmunk set out to reestablish dominion over the planet.
They set out in three different directions to conquer all of the lands that had broken apart amid the war that was going on. It was indeed very tedious work. Most of it was just informing the leaders of all the lands that RoboRabbit still ruled. They simply traveled from place to place for this part, the boring part. It took about a month total, but they eventually reasserted control over the whole planet, only having to convince a few peoples with force. The one place they avoided, of course, was Blokushneka. With only three of them, they doubted that they could defeat another squirrel army.
“Well,” said Darkprint, “it seems to me that wandering through the forest won't get us anywhere.”
“What were you thinking we should do?” asked Big Fat Husky.
“How about we start chopping tress? That way is we go back to a place we've been, we'll know we've been there because the trees are chopped down.”
“Sounds like a plan to me,” said Green Wart Hog. So they fashioned some axes out of trees and rocks, and they started chopping trees.
Now Armaninx had given Green Wart Hog the Pshom Paqyufj, an enchanted straw that, when blown upon, would create a noise heard by everyone on planet Iohsw. He was to use it as a signal that they had defeated Teddy. He had already used it, so Armaninx knew that they had won. None were sure when RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome would return, so Armaninx, Big Tall Moose, and Tiny Chipmunk set out to reestablish dominion over the planet.
They set out in three different directions to conquer all of the lands that had broken apart amid the war that was going on. It was indeed very tedious work. Most of it was just informing the leaders of all the lands that RoboRabbit still ruled. They simply traveled from place to place for this part, the boring part. It took about a month total, but they eventually reasserted control over the whole planet, only having to convince a few peoples with force. The one place they avoided, of course, was Blokushneka. With only three of them, they doubted that they could defeat another squirrel army.
Dohp
“It was then that I heard of your accomplishments on Iohsw,” said Claudio McAwesome. “So, I left Nifap to come help you with said accomplishments. I heard you were going to Standos, so I set forth to meet you there.”
“Well,” said RoboRabbit, “you were perfectly timed. But how could you have heard of my accomplishments in the first place?”
“Armaninx publishes a newspaper,” replied Claudio McAwesome. “He must have continued it in secret whilst traveling with you.”
“I am glad that you had combat training, and honored that you would leave your home planet to come to my aid.”
They had been walking for quite some time on planet Dohp, where Teddy had landed. They had destroyed Teddy's ship and locked theirs before tracking him. Dohp was a very green planet with no trees, only grass and a few bushes here and there.
“There are many reasons for my departure from Nifap,” said Claudio McAwesome. “The people wanted me to stay, but not because they would miss me. They wanted me to be exactly like all the other people on my planet, with no influence from you or anyone else. But the truth is that I'm not like them.”
“Aren't they muqcif?”
“Yes, but I'm not. I have yet to decide what I am, but I'm certainly not muqcif.”
“Well, maybe on this journey you will discover what you are,” said RoboRabbit, turning the other way to see if there were any traces of Teddy. There were none. He turned back to Claudio McAwesome to find that she was no longer there. He heard nothing. It was complete silence.
RoboRabbit continued to stroll along through the grass, feeling more sad and lonely than ever before. The tracks he was following were less than an hour old. He was getting close to Teddy. After about half an hour he started to recognize the landscape around him. He was minutes behind Teddy, who had apparently gone in a circle. He walked up to the place he had parked, right next to Teddy's now-destroyed ship, and beheld his own ship taking off.
“Goodbye, RoboRabbit,” said Teddy, “and have a nice eternity stranded on Dohp!”
RoboRabbit shot at the ship, but his efforts were futile. He had too awesome of a ship. Now he was truly alone. He was alone to wander Dohp for all eternity, searching for that which could have been his. And Claudio McAwesome was obviously taken by some other enemy. Maybe RoboRabbit shouldn't have banished the squirrels after all.
“Well,” said RoboRabbit, “you were perfectly timed. But how could you have heard of my accomplishments in the first place?”
“Armaninx publishes a newspaper,” replied Claudio McAwesome. “He must have continued it in secret whilst traveling with you.”
“I am glad that you had combat training, and honored that you would leave your home planet to come to my aid.”
They had been walking for quite some time on planet Dohp, where Teddy had landed. They had destroyed Teddy's ship and locked theirs before tracking him. Dohp was a very green planet with no trees, only grass and a few bushes here and there.
“There are many reasons for my departure from Nifap,” said Claudio McAwesome. “The people wanted me to stay, but not because they would miss me. They wanted me to be exactly like all the other people on my planet, with no influence from you or anyone else. But the truth is that I'm not like them.”
“Aren't they muqcif?”
“Yes, but I'm not. I have yet to decide what I am, but I'm certainly not muqcif.”
“Well, maybe on this journey you will discover what you are,” said RoboRabbit, turning the other way to see if there were any traces of Teddy. There were none. He turned back to Claudio McAwesome to find that she was no longer there. He heard nothing. It was complete silence.
RoboRabbit continued to stroll along through the grass, feeling more sad and lonely than ever before. The tracks he was following were less than an hour old. He was getting close to Teddy. After about half an hour he started to recognize the landscape around him. He was minutes behind Teddy, who had apparently gone in a circle. He walked up to the place he had parked, right next to Teddy's now-destroyed ship, and beheld his own ship taking off.
“Goodbye, RoboRabbit,” said Teddy, “and have a nice eternity stranded on Dohp!”
RoboRabbit shot at the ship, but his efforts were futile. He had too awesome of a ship. Now he was truly alone. He was alone to wander Dohp for all eternity, searching for that which could have been his. And Claudio McAwesome was obviously taken by some other enemy. Maybe RoboRabbit shouldn't have banished the squirrels after all.
Master Plan
Big Fat Husky clambered onto the wall. He had to open the portcullis from within. He walked across the stone wall and climbed down the opposite side, then he walked over to the mechanism which controlled the gate and controlled the gate with it. What a concept.
Big Tall Moose, Tiny Chipmunk, and Darkprint came in through the now open gate. They walked along the path and came to a hallway that ran the entire length of Teddy's castle. Big Tall Moose rammed his antlers into the door to break it down. They walked into the hallway and started going to the end of it. Whenever they came to a room on the side of the hallway, squirrels would pop out. Without exception, they battled and defeated every squirrel in the hallway. It slowed them down considerably, but they eventually made it to the end of the hallway, where they found a door labeled “This is definitely NOT Teddy's throne room.” They opened the door and went in, and their faces ran into a brick wall right where the door had been.
It was then that they noticed another door labeled “This definitely MIGHT be Teddy's throne room.” They entered and ran directly into a giant pie. Only then was it that they noticed a third door labeled “This is definitely Teddy's throne room.” They went in and found Teddy in his throne with two guards next to him, and there, in front of him, were Armaninx and Green Wart Hog, bound with metal coils.
“Finally,” said Darkprint. “We have found you. We've been lacking in comic relief, what with RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome gone and you two captured.”
Then Tiny Chipmunk blasted the coils off with her mega deadly laser. Armaninx and Green Wart Hog advanced upon Teddy, and the two royal squirrel guards engaged them [in combat]. With help, they defeated the guards, but Teddy had already escaped through an escape route that led conveniently right to the beginning of the hallway they had spent all day traversing. Big Fat Husky, Green Wart Hog, and Darkprint left Armaninx, Big Tall Moose, and Tiny Chipmunk in the throne room to prevent Teddy from coming back through the secret passage and ran down the hallway.
“Holy cow!” exclaimed Darkprint.
“What?” asked Green Wart Hog.
“That cow over there. It's full of holes. You know, holy.” Green Wart Hog then looked and saw that there actually was a holy cow in the hallway. He zapped it and they continued on their way.
When they finally caught up with Teddy, they were in the middle of a forest, a long way from the hallway. They met up with him and surrounded him.
“Teddy,” said Green Wart Hog, “we have you surrounded. Come out with your hands up and I promise we'll kill you anyway!”
Teddy came out and they dispatched him. With his dying breath he asked them, “What now?”
Then they realized that they had no idea how to get out of the forest.
Big Tall Moose, Tiny Chipmunk, and Darkprint came in through the now open gate. They walked along the path and came to a hallway that ran the entire length of Teddy's castle. Big Tall Moose rammed his antlers into the door to break it down. They walked into the hallway and started going to the end of it. Whenever they came to a room on the side of the hallway, squirrels would pop out. Without exception, they battled and defeated every squirrel in the hallway. It slowed them down considerably, but they eventually made it to the end of the hallway, where they found a door labeled “This is definitely NOT Teddy's throne room.” They opened the door and went in, and their faces ran into a brick wall right where the door had been.
It was then that they noticed another door labeled “This definitely MIGHT be Teddy's throne room.” They entered and ran directly into a giant pie. Only then was it that they noticed a third door labeled “This is definitely Teddy's throne room.” They went in and found Teddy in his throne with two guards next to him, and there, in front of him, were Armaninx and Green Wart Hog, bound with metal coils.
“Finally,” said Darkprint. “We have found you. We've been lacking in comic relief, what with RoboRabbit and Claudio McAwesome gone and you two captured.”
Then Tiny Chipmunk blasted the coils off with her mega deadly laser. Armaninx and Green Wart Hog advanced upon Teddy, and the two royal squirrel guards engaged them [in combat]. With help, they defeated the guards, but Teddy had already escaped through an escape route that led conveniently right to the beginning of the hallway they had spent all day traversing. Big Fat Husky, Green Wart Hog, and Darkprint left Armaninx, Big Tall Moose, and Tiny Chipmunk in the throne room to prevent Teddy from coming back through the secret passage and ran down the hallway.
“Holy cow!” exclaimed Darkprint.
“What?” asked Green Wart Hog.
“That cow over there. It's full of holes. You know, holy.” Green Wart Hog then looked and saw that there actually was a holy cow in the hallway. He zapped it and they continued on their way.
When they finally caught up with Teddy, they were in the middle of a forest, a long way from the hallway. They met up with him and surrounded him.
“Teddy,” said Green Wart Hog, “we have you surrounded. Come out with your hands up and I promise we'll kill you anyway!”
Teddy came out and they dispatched him. With his dying breath he asked them, “What now?”
Then they realized that they had no idea how to get out of the forest.
The Root of the Problem
Armaninx awoke to someone hitting on the head. He was bound with some metal coil and next to him was Green Wart Hog, who was similarly bound. In front of him was Teddy, along with two royal squirrel guards. Teddy was sitting in the same throne they had first seen him in. It was the exact same room they had been taken to when they were first defeated. Armaninx even recognized the closet they had been held in on one side of the room.
“I might as well tell you that those coils you are bound with prevent you from escaping the same way you did last time,” said Teddy.
“Why are you doing this?” asked Armaninx.
“I'm glad you asked. It's time for a history lesson. A long, long time ago, our world as we know it began,” Teddy began, “with an explosion of some sort that transformed everyone into animals. At this same time was RoboRabbit created by the Vine Master. He weakened the Vine Master and left him for dead, and he ventured out into the world. He helped the bunnies win the first battle of the war which has continued to this day. Then he betrayed the bunnies, taking the life of one of them for himself.
“RoboRabbit, now a cyborg, came to you, Armaninx and Green Wart Hog, and your team, and he battled your entire force, defeating everyone but Armaninx. He and you were then trapped in a place that you could only escape from by working together. RoboRabbit considered it for the next billion years and finally decided to side with you. Then, with your help, he established dominion over the entire planet.
“We, the squirrels, were a happy part of that empire for over a year, but were were flourishing too much. The empire was running low on food supplies, and RoboRabbit wasn't sure what to do at first. However, he soon decided to simply banish from his empire the animals he considered to be the stupidest and second largest part of it: The squirrels. He banished us to Blokushneka and left us to fend for ourselves. That is why we are doing this, for revenge on the evil emperor RoboRabbit. Now we have his two oldest and closest companions, and we can use them as hostages.”
“That's actually a good reason,” said Green Wart Hog. “I had no idea he had banished you. He led everyone to believe you seceded.”
“I might as well tell you that those coils you are bound with prevent you from escaping the same way you did last time,” said Teddy.
“Why are you doing this?” asked Armaninx.
“I'm glad you asked. It's time for a history lesson. A long, long time ago, our world as we know it began,” Teddy began, “with an explosion of some sort that transformed everyone into animals. At this same time was RoboRabbit created by the Vine Master. He weakened the Vine Master and left him for dead, and he ventured out into the world. He helped the bunnies win the first battle of the war which has continued to this day. Then he betrayed the bunnies, taking the life of one of them for himself.
“RoboRabbit, now a cyborg, came to you, Armaninx and Green Wart Hog, and your team, and he battled your entire force, defeating everyone but Armaninx. He and you were then trapped in a place that you could only escape from by working together. RoboRabbit considered it for the next billion years and finally decided to side with you. Then, with your help, he established dominion over the entire planet.
“We, the squirrels, were a happy part of that empire for over a year, but were were flourishing too much. The empire was running low on food supplies, and RoboRabbit wasn't sure what to do at first. However, he soon decided to simply banish from his empire the animals he considered to be the stupidest and second largest part of it: The squirrels. He banished us to Blokushneka and left us to fend for ourselves. That is why we are doing this, for revenge on the evil emperor RoboRabbit. Now we have his two oldest and closest companions, and we can use them as hostages.”
“That's actually a good reason,” said Green Wart Hog. “I had no idea he had banished you. He led everyone to believe you seceded.”
Eggsaladasia
Claudio McAwesome walked through the empty hallway, wondering where all the guards had gone. It was completely silent as she went on through the unoccupied passages. She came upon many empty rooms, all of which had some sort of wreckage in them. One room even had signs of an explosion. After a long time spent walking she came to a room at the end of the hall. She entered and saw, of all people, RoboRabbit. He had already pressed the big red button in the room.
“Hi!” exclaimed RoboRabbit, waving at Claudio McAwesome.
“Hai*,” replied Claudio McAwesome.
“¿Como estás?” preguntó RoboRabbit.
“Así, así,” contestó Claudio McAwesome. “¿Por qué estás aquí?”
“Estoy aquí para encontrar Teddy.”
“Creo que no tengo que estar aquí, porque estás aquí.”
“¿Por qué estás aquí?”
“Estoy aquí para encontrar el botón rojo grande.”
“Oh, and I already pressed it. I see.”
“Yeah, I could have been halfway through Wragglefraggleland by now. We might have been able to catch up with Teddy if we mustered up enough force for a victory we could relish. Now he will most likely get away.”
“Worry not, said RoboRabbit. “Together, we will go twice as fat to press the button in Wragglefraggleland and catch up with Teddy.”
“Yes, that makes perfect sense.” And even though Claudio McAwesome was being sarcastic, they actually went twice as fast together as they would apart. They easily overcame all Teddys and other squirrels on the way and pressed the button in Wragglefraggleland, then they took off and tried their best to catch up with Teddy, which shouldn't be too hard because their ship was butter than his.
*This is the actual pronunciation.
“Hi!” exclaimed RoboRabbit, waving at Claudio McAwesome.
“Hai*,” replied Claudio McAwesome.
“¿Como estás?” preguntó RoboRabbit.
“Así, así,” contestó Claudio McAwesome. “¿Por qué estás aquí?”
“Estoy aquí para encontrar Teddy.”
“Creo que no tengo que estar aquí, porque estás aquí.”
“¿Por qué estás aquí?”
“Estoy aquí para encontrar el botón rojo grande.”
“Oh, and I already pressed it. I see.”
“Yeah, I could have been halfway through Wragglefraggleland by now. We might have been able to catch up with Teddy if we mustered up enough force for a victory we could relish. Now he will most likely get away.”
“Worry not, said RoboRabbit. “Together, we will go twice as fat to press the button in Wragglefraggleland and catch up with Teddy.”
“Yes, that makes perfect sense.” And even though Claudio McAwesome was being sarcastic, they actually went twice as fast together as they would apart. They easily overcame all Teddys and other squirrels on the way and pressed the button in Wragglefraggleland, then they took off and tried their best to catch up with Teddy, which shouldn't be too hard because their ship was butter than his.
*This is the actual pronunciation.
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